


as a shrike to your sharp and glorious form

by mariette



Series: remember me love, when i'm reborn [2]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Flashbacks, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Post-Canon, Recreational Drug Use, Slow Burn, Tagged mature for difficult topics, Tags to be added, This sounds like it’s going to be really intense but I promise it’s not, Trans Taako (The Adventure Zone), Unplanned Pregnancy, taako’s having it a little rough but so is the rest of the family, they get better together.... eventually
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-20
Updated: 2019-11-03
Packaged: 2019-11-26 00:35:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18173513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariette/pseuds/mariette
Summary: "Unfortunately, he can’t dwell on the situation for too long. He really doesn’t even have the capacity to completely understand what’s going on. He’s expended so much energy his eyelids are already falling. But just as he falls out of consciousness he forces himself to think it. Because it’s different this time. He’s pregnant and ithasto be different this time."The entire universe has been saved and it's time for Taako to settle down. He has two wonderful boyfriends, a brand new school, and the weight of the world off his shoulders. Everything is okay. (Everything is not okay.)Taako gets pregnant. Magnus does his best. Kravitz gets a surprise. Things are totally, definitely, under control.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This took me... so long to post. I have been holding onto this story for a very long time. Hopefully you've read the prequel that goes to this, you'll need to! I'm going to be adding tags to this as I go along so make sure you're paying attention to those as they go! And disclaimer: this chapter is only half(?) beta'd. Next upload I'll have it fully beta'd!  
> Honestly, I thought I was going to have a lot more to say about it but at this point I think I should let the story talk.  
> Thank you for supporting me. I'll see you next week.  
> P.S. strap in, this is a long one.

There’s something about surviving the end of the world that’s very… lonely. It’s not like Taako isn’t thrilled about the fact that The Hunger is finally gone and they don’t have to run anymore. But now he has an  _ apartment, _ a  _ routine _ and the monotony of it all is nauseating to say the least. Everyone else around him seems to have moved on in strides from that day. Taako feels like he’s standing in a pit of his own.

He’s on his way to the school. Ren called him about some lecture she promised the students he’d be at and now he  _ actually _ has to go. Lectures haven’t ever been the way he teaches. He prefers to have them do the magic right away but Ren says it’s a lawsuit if they hurt themselves. Which,  _ rude. _ Angus only hurt himself several times when Taako taught him and it wasn’t even that  _ bad. _ The kid survived. However, since he left Ren in charge he figures might as well do things her way.

There’s something about walking around a school full of people that know very intimate details about the last century of your life. It’s no secret that Taako enjoys attention,  _ it’s all about the brand baby. _ But Lucretia wrote  _ a lot _ down. A lot of things he wishes she hadn’t now that he knows the consequences of it all. The looks he gets from people, the whispers, the smiles, the sad eyes. He knows exactly what they’re saying, exactly what they’re thinking, and he could crawl in a hole and fucking die right now.

He makes a beeline for his office and slams the door. His head rests against the door and he takes a breath in. It’s fine. He’s known for awhile that people he’s never met in his life know a fuck ton about his own.  _ It’s fine and he’s dealt with it. _ That doesn’t mean he can’t take a break because it’s a bit much sometimes.

When he gets himself in order he finds the lecture hall he’s supposed to be at. Luckily, most of the students were in class now so the hallways were empty. He’s able to slip into the door so quietly none of the students turn.

Ren’s in the middle of talking, he’s a little late.  _ Oops. _ She notices him but moves on with her lecture smoothly.

“-and that’s the thing about working with spells. It takes a lot of mental strain and energy. Which is why sometimes you can only cast certain ones for a small amount of time. But the  _ good _ thing about all of this is that you can become a powerful spellcaster. Maybe even as powerful as Taako.” Ren winks at Taako, he rolls his eyes. She starts pacing back and forth, gesturing with her hands. “When I say the words ‘mental training’ what comes to mind?”

A small halfling girl raises her hand. Ren points to her.

“Do difficult tasks? Or try a lot of new things to stimulate the brain?” she asks, unsure of her own answer. Ren gives an encouraging smile.

“Yes, exactly. Those sorts of practices can help your focus. Which we all know is a core aspect of spellcasting. If you maintain focus you can keep a spell longer. Now, there’s something that helps your spells  _ strength. _ Can anyone think of  _ anything _ that can make you a stronger spell caster?” She stops pacing and looks into the crowd of students. No one raises their hand. Ren nods to herself and paces again.

“If someone goes through a traumatic experience it’s hard for them to talk about it. Some people don’t even  _ remember _ their trauma because of the fierce emotional response. When you have an emotional reaction to something, you’re training your brain. When you put emotions  _ into _ your spellcasting, you’re becoming a more powerful caster.” She holds her hand up and a small orb of light flickers to life in her palm. Taako watches as all the students sit up taller and move closer to her. “Who here knows the meaning of the word melancholy?” She scans the room and nods to a slender human boy with his hand raised.

_ One week after Magnus died, he left The Starblaster to go for a walk. He didn’t plan on going as far as he did. Too lost in thought, in grief, in confusion to really care where he was going. It wasn’t until the moons were above and bugs chirped around him that he realized where he’d ended up. _

_ A stream of water lay a few feet ahead of him. He’s sure that the ship is too far to walk back and to be honest, he was too fucking exhausted to walk any farther. There were rocks in the middle of the stream, large enough for Taako to sit on. _

_ The water was cold against his bare skin, he instinctively put a hand on his belly. He sucked in a quick breath of air until he fully sat on the rock. The water rushed past his torso leaving the skin above it prickling with goosebumps. Taako sighed. _

_ Magnus should have been here. He should have seen Taako’s belly swollen, should have felt the baby kick against his stomach. Should have been there when he was vomiting over the side of the bed for the third time that night. It should be him there instead of Lucretia and Merle.  _

_ A familiar energy formed a pit in his stomach. He lifted his arm, wand in hand, and shot magic missles out toward a tree. It took mere seconds for the tree to be engulfed in flames, lighting up the surrounding forest and the stream underneath of him a violent orange. _

_ He hated doing this alone. He wished that the fire and the flood would wash him away. _

“Melancholy means being lost in sadness,” the student says, interrupting Taako’s thoughts. He flicks his eyes back over to Ren who seems to have been watching him. She looks down at the orb in her hand, speaking much softer than before.

“When someone feels melancholy they’re reflective, and thoughtful. Their brain is processing through some of the most difficult parts of itself, emotion. Just because you feel sad doesn’t mean you’re weak. It’s actually quite the opposite. Sometimes it makes you-” she pauses. The light in her hand glows brighter, it grows bigger and bigger. Until finally, when it’s almost the size of her head, she looks up at the students and it bursts in her hand. The orb sends golden light showering down through her fingers. “Sometimes it makes you stronger.”

The students erupt in applause for her, some even stand. She looks up with a bright smile on her face. Taako gets up quickly and heads to the door. Their eyes meet briefly but he’s already slipping through into the hallway.

It doesn’t take her long to find him, although maybe she wasn’t looking in the first place. He is in her office after all. He’s sitting on top of her desk playing with one of those weird toys where the ball clack against each other.

“Sup, Teach?” He frowns down at the desk. “I don’t have cool toys in my office.”

“Sorry, you have to be here more often to get desk toys,” she says. Taako groans and hops off of her desk.

“Did you have me come here so you could make me  _ work? _ ”

“Oh, I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Okay good. And hey, I know it’s not really my thing but, uh, that lecture was pretty fuckin good, Ren.”

“Aw, thanks that means a lot. But you know, I did invite you so  _ you _ could speak to them too.” She moves to go behind her desk and grabs paperwork. Taako sighs and whips around to face her.

“Seemed like you were on a roll. Didn’t wanna,” he circles his hand in front of her. “Hold that back.”

“O-o-kay, what’s going on?” She stops moving the papers. Taako’s eyebrow quirks in surprise.

“Uh, nothing?”

“You just complimented me! You don’t do that unless something’s wrong!”

“Hey, I’ve complimented you  _ plenty _ of times,” he says defensive.

“Yeah, then a giant purple worm came out of the ground and I died.  _ Dozens  _ of times.”

Taako waves his hands dismissively. “Whatever. Can’t give my friend a  _ compliment. _ ”

“There! You- you just called me your friend! You don’t  _ do _ that shit.”

“Damn, enough with the third degree,” he says. He drops his arms and huffs. “Fine I just- I don’t love this place as much as I used to.”

Ren sighs and sits on her chair. She runs a hand through her hair, then rests it back on the desk. He can see her trying to think of something to say. He decides to stay quiet as well.

“Yeah, I kind of had a feeling. Can I ask why?”

Taako sucks in a breath. He doesn’t want to talk about it, he doesn’t think it’s important. His leg sticks out and he connects his foot to the floor with a soft thud. “The ol’ brand isn’t where I want it to be. Need to do some soul searching or what the fuck ever.” He puts his arms on his hips. Ren sits up, her full attention on Taako now.

“Wait, you’re resigning?” Ren asks, her voice moving up an octave.

“More like a sabbatical?”

“Is this- I mean…” She sighs. “Are you sure?”

“Psh, I’m never sure about anything. But, yeah. This’ll be good for these old bones y’know. Take a little vacay or somethin’. Who knows.”

“Yeah but-”

“Oh, could go to the tropics. That’d be fun.”

“Taako I-”

“Magnus might want to bring the dogs though that’d put a hinder on-”

“Taako!” Ren yells. She slams her palms against the desk and stands at her full height. Taako shuts his mouth and looks at her. She exhales and moves the hair from her face. “I don’t think I can  _ do _ this without you.”

He smiles. “Sure you can. You’re doing pretty good so far. If my teaching has to be replaced by anyone it should be you.” He hops on the desk and leans over toward her. “After all, you  _ are _ my best student.”

She blushes.

“Okay,” she says quietly. “If you say so then, yes. I can do this for you.”

“Great!” he clasps his hands together and hops off the desk. “Then I’m gonna go ahead and skeedaddle. Got some biznitch to deal with at home.” He walks backwards giving her finger guns. She shakes her head but smiles nonetheless.

“Oh, Taako?” He’s got his hands on the doorknob but turns around to look at her. “You didn’t get to hear the last part of the lecture.”

He leans against the doorknob. “Aw, I missed the grand finale? What is it?”

“It’s pretty simple actually. Has a much better sound to it with the rest of my lecture attached to be honest. But being a powerful wizard means believing in a feeling more powerful than oneself.”

Kravitz rips a hole into Taako’s bedroom and smiles at the scene that’s laid out on the bed in front of him. Magnus is fast asleep while Taako’s hands are busy flicking three small orbs of light around. They're both sprawled out on the bed looking more than comfortable. Taako takes the time to look up and give Kravitz a smile before returning to moving the orbs around. Kravitz gives a soft smile back and transforms to his human form, scythe disappearing at the same time. Without saying anything, Taako lifts his arm up and invites Kravtiz to lay down on his other side. He happily obliges and slides in next to him. Magnus stirs a bit and Taako adjusts accordingly but the brunette stays asleep. Taako settles into Kravitz’s cool touch and sighs.

“Have a good day?” Kravitz whispers. Taako nods.

“Angus called me on his way to school. He was telling me about some new spells he learned. It was actually pretty cute, but don’t-”

“Tell him,” Kravitz interrupts. “Never do.” Taako smiles up at him and gives him a small kiss.

“Maggie showed up stressed out. Not sure what it was about. He came in all worked up and then fell asleep like this. Been in here with him for a few hours. I haven’t even had a chance to make him lunch yet.”

Kravitz slowly moves forward, taking a good look at his other partner, Taako looks with him. Magnus is usually at peace when he sleeps. Sometimes, when Kravitz shows up late at night, Taako catches him watching Magnus as he sleeps. Always so peaceful and pure. But now as Taako looks at him he can see the worry lines and bags under his eyes.

“What do you think it is?”

It’s been a relatively boring day for Taako. He wasn’t expecting to have any visitors. Magnus had been gone for a few weeks already tending to his school. He got a new batch of puppies in and wanted to take extra time getting them acclimated. That was cool, Taako was cool with that.

Lup and Barry have been away for almost a month at this point with Kravitz. Sure, they checked in from time to time but it was only for about five minutes before they were pulled away with a new lead. And no, he doesn’t  _ miss _ them. He just gets lonely sometimes.

To his surprise, Magnus came into the apartment late in the morning. He was quick to give Taako a hug, but didn’t say much except that he was exhausted and he could really use a nap. Of course, Taako wasn’t going to argue. He was glad to spend any time he could with Magnus.

“Did he say anything to you?” Kravitz asks, pulling him out of his thoughts. Taako shakes his head.

“No, it wasn't anything like that. It's just, he came in and he was extra clingy. It's not like I was  _ upset _ about the extra affection. It was just… it seemed kind of desperate I guess.”

“Maybe he was acting like that because he hasn't seen you in awhile? It's been what? Two weeks? That's a long time for him.”

Taako looks down at the sleeping man next to him. With his forehead creased and face strained.

“I think he misses us,” Taako says. 

Kravitz furrows his eyebrows. “Yeah, I just said that.”

“No like,” Taako starts. He stares back down and rubs a light blue hand through his hair. He knows what Magnus is feeling, he’s feeling it too. It’s just that his partner has a much better way of showing it. “Not just you and me. He misses all of us. You, me, Lup, Barry...”

Kravitz doesn’t say anything for awhile. Taako can feel his eyes on him as he strokes Magnus’ hair. Eventually, Magnus’ face starts to soften and it seems like he’s going into a deeper sleep simply from Taako’s touch.

“Taako?” Kravitz asks.

“Mm?” he hums in reply, still distracted by Magnus.

“Let’s move in together,” he says. Taako’s hand stops moving.

“What’d you say, bones?”

“M-move in with me?”

Kravitz bites his lip.

“Hmm, have to say I didn’t take you for the domestic type, Mr. Reaper,” Taako says.

“I want to be. With you and Magnus. I’ve actually given it quite a lot of thought. I hope that’s okay? I-I was thinking we could be right outside Raven’s Roost? It’s still close enough to both your schools. It could… it could work,” he says. Taako looks back down at Magnus when Kravitz says his name. He takes a couple more seconds to answer.

“Well can’t speak for him, although I’m sure he’ll say yes. But, yeah, guess I’m down,” he says. It sounds nonchalant, it sounds like he doesn’t care one way or another. Inside, though, inside there’s butterflies, and sparks, and had he let it happen a huge sigh of relief.

Kravitz leans over and presses a long, long kiss into Taako’s lips. Kravitz taste like cherries today. Taako pulls back and looks around the bed.

“Hmph,” he grunts.

“What?” Kravitz asks.

“Gonna need a bigger bed,” Taako says. Kravitz chuckles and looks down at the twin sized bed he and two grown men are currently sharing.

“Probably wouldn’t hurt,” he says.

Magnus stirs much more this time, and Taako let’s his arm go as the man sits up. He has major bed head and looks absolutely  _ exhausted, _ but Taako is delighted by him either way.

He shoots a glance at Kravitz. “Don’t tell him yet,” he whispers. Kravitz nods and Taako looks back down at his stirring partner.

“Mornin’ sunshine,” Taako sings. He sits back against the headboard all the way now, and cracks his upper back. Magnus rubs at his eyes until he finally opens them. He notices Kravitz first, then looks over at Taako.

“Mmph,” he groans. He sits up all the way and rubs at his eyes some more. “Nice surprise to wake up to.”

“Yeah, not everyone gets to wake up next to two hot studs like us,” Taako says pointing a thumb at Kravitz. “You hungry, Maggie?”

Magnus nods his head and yawns.

“Yeah, actually.”

Taako climbs over Kravitz and lands on the floor with a soft thud.

“Sandwiches for lunch?” he asks and bolts out of the room before hearing an answer. He spent too long in that bed, and while it was nice, he fucking  _ aches. _

When Taako gets to the kitchen, he starts working on the sandwiches. He knows Kravitz is going to say he doesn’t have to eat, he makes him one anyways. Otherwise he’ll keep sneaking bites from Magnus.  _ It’s just so I can taste it _ he always says.

The two of them emerge from the bedroom not long after he does. They’re laughing about something, but Taako decides not to ask. Better to let them have something between the two of them as well.

“Finally awake?” Taako asks. Magnus walks toward Taako and wraps him in a huge hug from behind.

“ _ Oof! _ ” Taako exclaims. The air gets knocked out of him and the knife flies out of his hand clamoring on the counter.

“Thank you,” he says. It’s muffled into Taako’s shoulder but he hears him.

“Uh? For the sandwich? No problemo, big guy. You wanna let me go so I can finish them?” Taako asks. Magnus sets him down.

“Not just the sandwich. For being a great boyfriend,” he says. Kravitz clears his throat from the couch and Magnus turns to look at him. “ _ One _ of the greatest boyfriends,” he corrects.

‘Great boyfriend’ seems like a bit of a stretch for Taako. But he lets him have it this time in hopes their quiet and awfully domestic afternoon continues. Magnus gives Taako a peck on the cheek and joins Kravitz on the couch. He purposely sits close enough that their thighs touch. They begin talking quietly to each other about Taako’s cat who’s now decided to crawl out from underneath the couch.

Taako tunes them out after that. He knows he could hear them easily, even with their hushed tones if he wanted to, but they need their moments on their own too. And Taako is more than happy to quietly watch from the sidelines.

He stares out the window. Past the trees blowing in the chilly wind, past the birds who chirped on the branches, past the crowded streets of people at the marketplace. He thinks to himself where his new home sits. Somewhere in Raven’s Roost he knows. But just thinking about it, sitting abandoned or not, waiting for him and his family to occupy it. It seems almost too good to be true.  
There’s something that’s missing when he thinks that. As if there’s  _ more _ to this family. Sure, Lup and Barry are part of his family as well but they’ve got their own things. Their own place and their own lives. This is Taako’s, and he has to be okay with that.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a part in this chapter that's not terribly descriptive with anxiety but the topic is certainly there. If that's a sensitive subject for you just be aware. Let me know what you think so far in the comments! See ya'll next week!!

“I'm going to die if you two don't tell me what this surprise is,” Magnus says.

He, Kravitz, and Taako were trekking through some woods outside of Raven’s Roost. At first, Taako had told him he wanted to see how the school was going so Magnus would take him with when he left his apartment. Then, right on schedule Kravitz showed up through a rift and offered to take them there. 

It didn't take long for Magnus to figure out something was up. Actually, it was mere seconds after they stepped through the rift in the middle of the forest. Magnus recognized the trees around him pretty quickly as well.

So now Kravitz and Taako have to deflect his questions in the hopes he doesn't figure it out before they get to their destination.

“Magnus you're really not going to die, I promise,” Kravitz says.

“Y’know being that dramatic about stuff isn't even fun anymore when I'm dating death,” Magnus mumbles. Taako gives a nod in solidarity with him.

“Anyways, Taako and I have been discussing something while you've been away at work,” Kravitz begins. He looks over at Taako as if to nudge him to continue.

“Magnus do you trust Krav and I?” Taako asks. Magnus slows down a little bit. Taako can sense his wariness. He really hopes he doesn't fuck this up.

“Yeah? Of course I do. ...What’s going on?” Magnus asks. Taako can see the break in the trees ahead of them. They're about to move through into the clearing.

“I bought a sick mansion wanna kick it with us in it?”

Magnus’s mouth drops as they pass through the trees. Kravitz groans and slaps a hand to his face.

“Taako you said you had a speech planned,” Kravitz said.

“Yeah, I told you that because I knew you’d say no to that sick delivery.”

“It wasn’t even that  _ good _ ,” Kravitz begins.

“ _ Guys _ this place is amazing,” Magnus chokes out.

A large two story house is built into the trees. It's a  _ massive  _ tree house. Well, more like a tree mansion just from the sheer size of it.

On the second story of the house there's a balcony that wraps itself completely around. Bridges are suspended around the thick trees and makes an intricate road to different parts of the balcony. There's one single set of stairs to get into the main entrance of the home. Taako watches as Magnus’s eyes connect with what else the clearing has to offer.

A small crick lay at the other side of the house. It flows quietly into a large pond surrounded by greenery. He could hear birds chirping and frogs croaking. He knew it was music to Magnus’s ears. He could see it on his face too.

“Is this…?” Magnus begins. His voice cracks and he falls off before he can finish. Kravitz places a hand at the small of his back.

“Our home. If you want it to be, of course,” Kravitz says.

“Yeah no pressure, but it’s, uh… it’s fuckin’ dope,” Taako says.

Magnus turns back to him and he just knows his ears are turning a much darker shade of blue. He tries to hold back the fact that this is a pretty intense moment for the three of them. He has a solid feeling in his gut that Magnus is going to be cool with this. But there's always that nagging voice in the back of his head. This time it's telling him that Magnus isn't ready for this type of commitment. Maybe none of them are.

Instead Magnus throws himself into both Kravitz and Taako’s arms and that's the end of that train of thought. He sobs in between their shoulders and they hold him up as he weeps.

“It's not much right now. The inside is sort of a mess,” Kravitz starts.

“I should mention that this is exactly how I thought this was going to go. So you owe me five gold pieces,” Taako says to Kravitz. The man only rolls his eyes at him. Magnus pulls back and wipes tears from his eyes. He kiss both men on the cheek and smiles at them.

“This is… everything I've ever wanted. Thank you,” Magnus says.

“Well, thank you. We'd be messes if you'd said no,” Kravitz says.

“Him more than me,” Taako defends. But Magnus is too busy looking at the house to pay him anymore attention.

“When do we get to move in?” Magnus asks. Taako walks toward the house and the two men follow behind him.

“That’s really up to you, babe. Krav and I found the place. It’s your call on what you want to do with the rest. I'll be honest. The inside is a hot mess. A hotter mess than  _ me _ actually. Can you even believe it? Anyways, if you want to hire someone we can go for it. But I have a feeling you're gonna wanna take this one for yourself.”

They’re at the foot of the stairs now. Taako has one foot on the step and an arm resting on the railing. He sighs and flutters his eyelashes at his partners.

“Care for the grand tour?” He asks.

There’s a reason Taako chose this home. It wasn’t because of the way it was built even though that was a  _ huge _ selling point. (For Magnus not for him). It wasn’t because of the giant built in library. (For Kravitz not for him). Honestly, it wasn’t even the gigantic kitchen that sold it for him, although,  _ fucking bonus _ .

He’s always been the kind of person that’s had a lot of space. Maybe not at the rough beginning of his life, but Starblaster era? There was  _ plenty _ of room. There were seven bedrooms, a common room, three bathrooms, and a plethora of extra space. So when he moved into his apartment, things got real cramped and real uncomfortable uncomfortable.

“Sheesh, you guys are a bunch of chumps,” Taako says.

“Shut up,” Magnus says as he wipes away tears.

They’re stood on the balcony now watching the sunset. Kravitz and Magnus are bouncing ideas off of each other. Beginning with the fact that they  _ need _ to have a woodworking room. Taako watches, a hand propped under his chin, his eyes probably glittering at the sight of them. It’s disgustingly romantic. But he doesn’t care, he enjoys listening to the two of them plan out such an important part of their lives. He’s happy to be a part of it.

“Lup’s going to throw down with Taako over the way the kitchen’s set up,” Magnus says.

“Huh?” Taako replies. “Lup’s not going to have any say in what  _ my _ kitchen looks like.”

Magnus laughs. “Okay if she hears you try to lay claim on the kitchen when she’s gonna live here too? You’re asking to get your ass fried by some fire.

“I didn’t ask Lup to move in,” Taako says.

“Yeah, but you will.” Magnus waves his hand dismissively. Taako ignores that comment but he catches Kravitz’ confused glance. He ignores that too.

“So, do you like it?” Taako asks, promptly changing the subject.

“Are you kidding me? I fucking love it,” Magnus says. “When can we move in?”

“As soon as we get it fixed up. It’s already ours,” Kravitz says. He makes his scythe appear, getting ready to rip them a hole back to Taako’s apartment. Taako shrugs.

“Turns out when you save the universe and everything in it, you get special favors from the locals,” he says.

Magnus is kissing him again. Suddenly and passionately. Taako curls his arms around his waist and leans into it. Magnus’s beard scruff scratches at his cheeks and makes the elf giggle.

“You gonna help me fix her up?”

Taako snorts and puts his hand over his face. He has his eyes scrunched up as he laughs and has to take a breath before answering.

“Oh, bubeleh. Never used a melee weapon in my life. Certainly  _ not _ going to start with a hammer.”

* * *

 

Taako wakes up the next morning with the bed cold. He knew Magnus was leaving early to go back to the school and would be coming back whenever Kravitz did. And he supposes Kravitz is on a bounty with Lup and Barry. That leaves him alone for who knows how long.

He lays in bed for a while thinking about what he could possibly do with his day. He could go to the school but after making such a big deal out of his sabbatical Ren won’t even let him near the place. Which fine, she can do all the paperwork then.

As if the universe is listening to his please his stone of farspeech crackles to life on the nightstand. He reaches for it and waits for the static to clear.

“-aako?” he hears. His face lights up.

“Angus! What’s up little man?” he asks. He lifts himself so he’s sat up on the bed.

“Hello, sir!” Angus says cheerfully on the other end. “I have some time off school, I was wondering if I could stay over?” Taako smiles into the phone.

“Sure thing, pumpkin! You’ll have to sleep on the couch again, though.”

“That’s okay!”

“Do you need Kravitz to pick you up?” Taako’s not even sure he could get ahold of him right now but he’d try for Angus.

“Nope! A friend from school has a wagon that’s going through your town, I can get dropped off later tonight! Is that okay?”

“Absolutely, my guy. I’ll be here waiting for ya. Hey what do you want me to-”

“Sounds good, see you tonight!” Angus cuts him off.

“Cook… for you,” Taako finishes. The stone of farspeech is already blinking red. He stares at it for a moment then sets it back down.

What do you do when you have an 11 year old coming over and a whole day ahead of you? Cook. And Taako is going to cook  _ everything. _

He tells himself that he isn’t going to cook himself into a frenzy. That he’ll keep the anxiety he’s had since the apocalypse ended at bay. There was no reason to be nervous, no reason to go into a panic,  _ no reason to freak the fuck out. _

But his hands are moving quicker and his breath is hitched in his throat. He looks down at his fingers and they’re shaking in the dough. When did his vision start to blur? He cracks under the pressure of his anxieties with barely a warning. One sentence fills his head and sticks like tar.

_ I’m alone. _

“Taako?”

His hands fly out of the dough he’s kneading. He snaps his neck up in surprise.

“Are you okay?” Kravitz is standing in front of the kitchen island Taako is working at. Scythe in hand and reforming into his skin. Must have just came through a portal.

“Oh thank  _ gods _ you’re back.” Taako sighs in relief. He runs over to Kravitz and jumps in his arms. Kravitz wraps his arms around him tightly and kisses him on the temple.

“I can only stay for a few minutes. We had a bit of a lapse in the hunt. I told Lup and Barry I’d come see you real quick since I don’t know when I’ll be back. Seriously, are you okay?” Kravitz says.

“I’m good, Bones,” he says. Kravitz sets Taako down and steps to the side, peering into the kitchen.

“What’s this for?” He gestures with his head toward the kitchen. Taako follows his gaze.

Counters lined with dirty bowls, cupboards open, several pies cooling on the window sill, pans and pans of lasagna waiting to be cooked. All of which supports Taako’s dream in becoming  _ that _ stereotype.

“Angus is coming over tonight. Gonna stay here for a little while he’s on a school break or something,” Taako says. He can feel his face involuntarily lighting up just at the mention of the boy. Gross.

“That’s great. Although, you know that it’s just the two of you, right?” Kravitz says.

“Yeah?” Taako replies. He furrows his brows at his partner. Kravitz nods again. This time referencing all the food in the kitchen.

“Oh. Yeah, went a little crazy with it.” Taako shrugs. “No biggie.” Kravitz pulls him in again and kisses the top of his head.

“Kind of feels like you’re trying to cook for more than that,” Kravitz says. Taako’s ear flicks and his face starts to color. He turns away quickly and walks back into the kitchen.

“Nah, it’s not like that. I’m just practicing some new recipes is all,” Taako says. Kravitz settles on humming as a reply.

“You know I’ve been meaning to ask you something but haven’t had a chance,” Kravitz says. Taako watches him warily. “Why wouldn’t you ask Lup to move in with us?”

_ -we’ll do this forever?  _ His ears flick.

“Why would I assume she would? She’s got her own life.” He moves to continue working at another dish. He’s placing ingredients into the bowl as Kravitz talks.

_ Yeah of course.  _ He shakes his head.

“From what I heard from her the two of you always planned to live together. Even if you found someone,” Kravitz says, his voice is just a whisper. Taako can barely hear him now.

_ The twin’s room is brilliant in every way. Small lights embedded in the ceiling sparkle like the night sky, crystals hang on strings peppering the room in their spectacular light. There’s a king size canopy bed that towers over every other piece of furniture. Tapestries cover all four walls and upon closer inspection reveal them to be complex designs of each world they’d visited. _

_ He steps into the room one afternoon and sees Lup sitting at the window bench. Her wine colored hair is up in a lazy bun, loose pieces of it fall soft on her cheeks. Her leg hangs from the side of the seat swishing back and forth. She has a mug of coffee in her hands and as a soft breeze comes through the window she shivers, pulling it closer to her lips. _

_ Taako joins her. They sit in silence for awhile, too entranced by the sound of branches rustling and birds chirping. Lup moves her hand and makes three balls of lights appear in between them and Taako watches their lazy dance. He sees her hand gesture as she whispers something. It’s too soft for even him to hear. Seconds later he hears the quiet sound of thunder rumbling. He looks back out the window and rests his cheek on his knees. _

_ “Love it when we do this,” he says. His voice muffled by his knee. _

_ When Lup doesn’t say anything he lifts his head. She’s leaning her forehead on the window sill, smiling softly. At Taako’s movement she turns to look at him. _

_ “Promise me we’ll do this forever?” she asks. _

_ “Do what? Hang out like this?” _

_ She shakes her head. “Not just that.” _

_ She moves her hand and pushes on the screen to pop it out. She sticks her fingers out to feel the breeze. Taako wiggles his toes as they get colder. _

_ “Live together, be around each other, attach ourselves at the hip. Y’know, twins things,” she says. Taako reaches out slowly and grabs a hold of Lup’s hand. Her smile grows, she looks back at Taako. _

_ “Yeah of course. I wouldn’t want it any other way,” he says. She rolls her eyes but her smile remains. She retrieves her hand but not before smacking Taako playfully. _

_ “Fucking sap,” she says. Taako taps her back. _

_ “Whatever, loser.” _

“-think that I would love that.”

Taako blinks a few times and remembers he has his hands in a bowl of flour and eggs.

“Huh?” he asks. He looks up at Kravitz who has a questioning look on his face.

“I said that I hope you’re not doing this on my account. I personally would love living with the two of them.” He’s eyeing up Taako almost making sure he’s okay. He’s fucking fine.

“I mean, you know. A lot can happen as the decades go on. Thought she’d want to start her own thing with Barry,” Taako says. He pulls his hands out of the bowl and rinses them off in the sink. Kravitz opens his mouth but slips it shut quickly. His gaze checks out in a way Taako has grown familiar with. He’s getting a call.

“I’m sorry, love. I’ve gotta cut this short. Lup just called for me.

“No worries. Gotta get stuff ready for when Angus gets here. And you know? It’s really weird that you a have a psychic connection with my own flesh and blood sister.”

Kravitz laughs as he rips open a portal. He can hear Barry yelling about something, but he’s out of view.

“Twins have some sort of connection don’t they?” He steps one leg through. Taako shrugs.

“Something like that.”

With that Kravitz smiles and disappears through the portal.

Taako turns back and looks into the kitchen. The counters filled with  _ plenty  _ dishes and flour has all but taken over his floor.

“Right,” he says, hands moving to his hips. “Should probably make a dessert.”

Not soon after he starts on a cheesecake there’s a knock at the door.

“Come in!” he yells deciding not to abandon pressing the crust into the pan. He hears the door open and shut, followed by the distinct sound of fancy boy shoes hitting the hardwood flooring. Angus skids into the room and catches himself in the doorframe.

“Hello, sir!” he exclaims. Taako smiles at the boy and watches him cross the room to look at the dishes Taako has set out on the table. “Wow you made so much!”

“What’s crackin’, Ango? How was the ride here?” he asks. He finishes pressing the crust and grabs at the cream cheese filling. Angus ambles over to the counter and watches as Taako pours the liquid.

“The ride was fine. The horses smelled bad,” Angus says. His nose scrunches up.

Taako smiles at him. He taps the cake pan against the counter and moves over to the fridge.

“Open that for me?” he asks. Angus does quickly and Taako sets the pan on one of the shelves. He sees as Angus’ eyes go wide.

“Wow! You made a lot of food,” he says. Taako groans and closes the door to the fridge with Angus’ hand still on it. He moves forward for a moment with the door but lets go as it slams shut.

“Why does everyone keep saying that? So what I made a lot of food? I’m a  _ famous chef _ , it’s what I do. At least I’m not  _ starving _ you people,” Taako says. Angus raises and eyebrow.

“Well, I mean, it  _ is _ a lot of food,” Angus says. Taako scoffs.

“Whatever kid. Can never have too much food. Remember that.”

Angus looks around at the apartment suddenly. “Where is everyone?”

“Oh, Magnus is back at his school. And the reap squad is out on a mission,” Taako says. He grabs at his spoon and folds the cheesecake mixture.

“Thought they were calling themselves the death brigade now?” Angus asks. He pulls out a dining room chair and stands on it so he can watch Taako work.

“Ugh.  _ No, _ Lup is awful at naming things. How do you think the ship got the name Starblaster?”

“Thought that was Merle.”

“No, his stupid just rubbed off on her.”

Angus laughs. Taako smiles.

“I’ll finish this up and then we can fuck around with some spell.”

“Oh yeah!” Angus perks up. “I have so many new ones to show you!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Wednesday, everyone! Sorry this one got put up so late, I had an extremely busy day! We're getting close to the exciting parts of the story so stay tuned. Thanks for reading, leave a comment if you're liking it so far!! PSA this chapter includes some ~recreational drug use~ which is legal both where I am from and now in this fantasy world. So, take that as you will.

Angus McDonald is a lot of things. A very impressive magic user, the world’s greatest detective, and the sneakiest mother fucker. Taako supposes that the sneakiness must come with the territory of being a small child detective. But how the  _ fuck _ was he able to sneak into Taako’s bedroom and fall asleep right next to him. Even more, how did Taako not wake up?

Sure, he’s had a long life sleeping next to someone. Between his early life and Starblaster era he  _ always _ had someone sleeping next to him. And yeah, he knows that as of lately he hasn’t because of how busy Magnus and Kravitz have been. But he shouldn’t have forgotten the feeling of someone getting into a bed next to him.

Now he has a small boy drooling on Magnus’s pillow. It’d be cute if Taako wasn’t as grumpy as he is in the morning. With one swift movement her slides Angus off the bed with his foot. He lands on the floor with a thud and Taako hears a small groan from the floor.

“That was rude,” Angus says. Taako crawls over the bed and pokes his head past the edge. Angus lays face up in a heap of blanket, staring at Taako.

“I have one rule. Taako gets the bed to himself.”

“There’s so much room! You don’t need that all to yourself!”

Taako slides himself off the bed, back aching in the process. He stretches up and walks toward the bedroom door.

“You clearly don’t know me that well, little man.”

Angus pops his head out from next to the bed, hair frizzing every which way.

“What are we doing today?”

Almost on cue Taako hears a rift open in the living room.

“Boys you’re never gonna believe it!” a shrill voice calls out.

Lup barrels into the room, a piece of paper flying in her hand as she runs.

“Morning,” Taako says. Lup hands him the piece of paper not saying a word.

He checks it out and groans. Barry comes into view and waves at Angus who’s already moving up toward Taako.

“I told her it could just be the two of us but she insisted you and Angus would want to go,” he says. Taako hands Lup the flyer back before Angus can grab at it.

“Hey!” he calls out. Taako shakes his head.

“No,” he says firmly.

Lup sticks her tongue out at him. “Yes.”

“ _ No. _ ”

“ _ Yes!” _

“What is it?” Angus yells. He’s pushing past Taako trying to grab the flyer, but the elf doesn’t budge.

“We are  _ not _ going to a science convention.”

* * *

 

They’d been walking around the venue hall for six very grueling hours. Lup and Angus were having the time of their  _ lives _ . Running from vendor to vendor, testing out the cool machinery they had, starstruck by some fancy professor Taako has never heard about.

“No magic in sight, how fucking boring is that?” Taako asks. He and Barry are hanging back as Lup and Angus purchase some merchandise from a booth. He watches as people leave the hall talking eagerly about everything they experienced.

“Yeah, a magic convention would have peaked my interest way more than this. Although, most convention centers frown upon necromancy as well. So I think either way I would have been bored.” Barry pushes his glasses against his nose and leans against the wall behind him.

“You still allowed to do necromancy? Isn’t that like, against your moral code or whatever?”

Barry snickers. “Against  _ my _ moral code? Taako you’ve known me too long to say that.”

“Alright, alright. Well didn’t the big boss say no more?”

“You’d be amazed on what she allows in the name of uh… research.”

Taako snorts as he laughs. “Can take the kid out of necromancy, can’t take the necromancy out of the kid.”

“Especially when that kid is a powerful being of necrotic energy wrapped up in a bow.”

“That was. The best day. Of my life.” Lup runs over to Barry and grabs onto his arm. Angus isn’t far behind and gives Taako a cheeky grin. He’s wearing a baseball cap with the words “Science Boy” on it.

“Can add that to your repertoire, Ango.” Taako pushes a finger on the hat making Angus sway back a little. He looks over at Lup who’s pulling a lava lamp keychain out of her bag of goodies. “Wanna come over for awhile tonight?”

“Yeah, for sure. I actually have a surprise for you so we’ll drop you two off at your place and come back in a little while.”

Taako cocks an eyebrow. “It’s not another convention is it?”

“You wish.”

“I really don’t.”

When they cut a rift into Taako’s living room he’s pleasantly surprised to see both Kravitz and Magnus sitting on the couch. Magnus carving wood and Kravitz reading.

“Hey!” Taako says excitedly. He bounds over to the couch and lands in between the two of them. Taako throws a dramatic hand over his forehead, resting his head on Kravitz’s shoulder. “Please! Save me! My evil sister took me hostage!”

“So dramatic, you had fun.” Lup crosses her arms.

“Yeah, pretty sure I saw that proud paternal look on your face when Angus met one of his idols,” Barry says.

Taako moves his hand from his face and glares at Barry.

“First of all, Barold, I don’t have a paternal bone in my body. Second of all, I looked happy because he tripped on his way up there.”

“You made me trip!” Angus cries. Magnus sits up and looks at Angus excitedly.

“What’d you get at the science fair, kiddo?” he asks.

Angus hurries over to the couch and sits in front of it on the floor. Lup makes a quick gesture toward Taako’s door and Barry nods.

“Going to get that surprise?” Taako asks.

“A surprise?” Kravitz echoes.

Lup smiles and winks. “We’ll be back.”

Angus tries really hard to stay awake. He told Taako that he  _ really _ wanted to know what the surprise was and said, “Don’t worry! I’m the world’s greatest detective, I can stay awake for anything.” But now he’s currently knocked out cold on Taako’s lap. A pile of science merchandise Angus was showing everyone on the floor in front of them.

Magnus lifts himself off the couch from next to Taako and puts his arms out.

“Let me take him into your bed. Krav and I can crash at my place,” Magnus says. Taako pouts up at him. The night so far has been so nice, so comfortable. He didn’t like the idea of everyone leaving.

“Okay.” He relents. “You’re not leaving anytime soon, though.”

Magnus smiles and bends down to pull the kid off of him. He stirs for a moment but quickly finds comfort in Magnus’ chest and falls back asleep. Taako’s stomach flutters, he ignores it.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

After Magnus gets back they’re able to talk a little louder. Instead of joining his two partners back on the couch he sits down on the floor trying to coax cat out from his hiding place.

“Not gonna come out unless your name is Kravitz,” Taako mentions offhandedly. Kravitz looks down at Magnus and smiles.

“I have animal proficiency.” Magnus pouts.

“Cat is a demon,” Taako says.

“Don’t be so mean to him. He’s not that bad,” Kravitz says. Taako and Magnus roll their eyes at the same time.

“Oh, sure. We just only ever see him when you’re here.” Taako pushes against Kravitz’s shoulder playfully.

And then Lup and Barry rip a rift through the living room. They’re giggling and practically trip over Magnus as they walk in. Barry actually manages to and tumbles into his lap.

“Jesus!” Magnus yelps. Lup bursts into laughter and falls onto the floor next to them. Taako raises an eyebrow and chuckles softly along with them.

“Welcome back,” Taako says. Lup looks up at him still smiling from the situation on the floor.

“Guess who’s house we just came back from?” she says. She pulls Barry up and leads him to the table, a small crimson box in tow.

Kravitz stands from the couch and walks over to the table, wrinkling his nose at something. Taako eyes the case suspiciously.

“Based on the smell of that  _ and _ you, I’d say Merle’s,” Magnus says. Taako shakes his head at his sister.

“What?” she asks. She scans the living room for a moment before making eye contact with her brother. “Is the kid still awake?”

“Lulu, we are too  _ old _ for this,” he says. He stands from the couch as well and saunters his way to the table. She tsks at him and opens the case up. An assortment of different herbs and whittled pipes lay in the box.

“Nonsense. Never too old. Plus, spooky bones here says he’s never tried this before. And I think it’s our moral obligation as stoners to… help him along,” Lup says. She pulls out the pieces and plants and lays them out on the table.

“ _ Stoners, _ ” Taako snorts. “Lup it’s been decades. I hardly doubt we’re classified as that anymore.”

Kravitz is eyeing the items on the table curiously. Taako pats his arm before joining Lup at the table. He paws at a few bags and examines what’s in them carefully. Magnus groans as he gets up from the floor. Taako hears his footsteps until the man is standing behind him and leaning over his shoulder. He whistles in surprise.

“Wow. Merle’s really been at work with these, huh?” He says. They nod in unison, all except Kravitz.

“There’s a first time for everything, even for the grim reaper. Let’s get going on this,” Taako says.

It doesn’t take long for Kravitz to catch on to how everything is done. A few practice hits for him and he was ready to go around in a circle. There were moments when he coughed a little too long or made a face because his lungs burned. Of course these moments were met with giggles erupting around them and Taako laying his head in his hands because he just can’t stop  _ laughing. _

“How does this even work? Like how are you guys actually getting  _ high? _ ” Taako asks. He doesn’t elaborate on the question but Lup understands what he’s saying either way. Shocker.

“I mean like we’re dead but we’re still, alive y’know?” she says. “I guess it’s like…” She stares up at the ceiling seeming deep in thought. Taako’s sure she’s completely forgotten she was even talking in the first place. Him and Barry giggle.

“Like in the same way Kravitz can bust one, right?” Magnus asks.

Kravitz chokes on his own gasp and Barry is sent into a laughing fit. Taako is absolutely  _ losing _ it next to Magnus and has to hold onto the larger man’s arm to keep himself sitting up right. Kravitz’ cheeks become a deep shade of red.

“If we’re getting technical then, no. It does not work in the same way I can  _ bust one, Magnus, _ ” Kravitz says. Magnus mouths an apology but laughs either way.

“It's the Raven Queen,” Barry says.

“Come again?” Taako asks. “ _ The Raven Queen _ let’s you get high as a kite?” Barry nods at him.

“She's the goddess of  _ life  _ and death. She's the reason Kravitz can get his freak on with you,” Lup says.

“Gross,” Taako says at the same time Magnus says “hot”. Kravitz groans into his hands. They continue laughing until they're all coughing.

Once Taako is able to regain his composure his high has reached a whole new level. He’s suddenly so  _ aware _ of where he is. He can feel each individual carpet fiber under his fingertips. He can hear the blood pumping in his ears. Or maybe, is it Magnus’ heart pumping he can hear? He looks over at the brunet and watches in what feels like slow motion as he throws his head back and laughs. The veins popping out of his neck in a way that Taako deems as completely inappropriate. He has no right looking this attractive while doing something so simple.

He senses Kravitz move next to him and his head swivels to the right. His vision sloshes and blurs as he goes but focuses on Kravitz just in time to see him yawn. The redness on his cheeks resurfaces but Taako realizes it’s more from exhaustion rather than embarrassment. How long has it been since he’s slept? As much as Taako would like to indulge that question further he’s suddenly distracted by Lup’s hand grasping his own.

He looks down at his sister who has a sad smile on her face. No, it’s not sad. It’s… worried? He flips her hand over into his palm and squeezes.

“What’s that face for, Lulu?” he asks.

“I just worry about you, sometimes.”

“Nothing to worry about. I’m super okay. You’re making sure of that,” he says. He reaches toward the ashtray and pulls out their half smoked joint. He lights it and takes a long inhale before passing it to her. He tries to hold it for as long as he can but eventually has to cough to let it all out.

“Sure, you’re great now. But what about when we leave?” she asks. His eyes flick over to Barry who’s listening to the conversation. He can hear Magnus and Kravitz quietly laughing to each other so at least they can’t hear this.

“I’m fine. Stop looking at me like that. Both of you,” he snaps. Lup tsks and hands the joint to Barry.

“Barry and I can come over whenever you want us to.  _ I _ can come over whenever you want me to. You just need to say the words and I’m here,” she says.

The buzzing feeling in his body turns itself into needles. His nerves splinter inside of him and his body wants to send itself in a panic. He swallows hard and forces it down. He’s fine. He’s  _ fucking fine. _

“Do you guys want to move into our new place with us?”

It comes out fast, and messy, and much louder than he was ready for. Magnus and Kravitz fall silent. Right, he didn’t actually discuss this with them. Well, maybe a little with Kravitz but nothing  _ definitive _ was said.

Lup breaks into a smile. Either not noticing Taako’s sudden panic or ignoring it all together. She wraps an arm around Taako and pulls him close.

“Yeah. I really fucking do.”

He lets go of a breath he didn’t know he was holding. Now that it’s over with he’s not sure why he was so nervous about asking her in the first place. Nothing she had ever done or said suggested she  _ didn’t _ want to continue their plan they made so many years ago. But he thinks that he was in his right mind assuming that had changed. It had been a  _ long time _ since they’d all been together.  _ A whole other life. _

Once Lup and Barry are properly out of their minds Kravitz offers to bring them home. Magnus is pretty close to falling asleep and Taako keeps reassuring everyone he’d be okay once they’re gone.

“Jeezy creezy you guys act like I’m gonna drop dead any second.  _ Go. _ Taako’s good.”

Lup stares at him as the portal closes, as if she’s going to jump through at the last second and attach herself to him. She just might, she hadn’t let go of him since he asked her to move in with him. He rolls his eyes and mouths  _ go _ at her. Eventually it closes taking everyone with it. And he’s okay with that because, well, it wasn’t  _ everyone. _

On any normal night it would take him a good hour before he finally gets himself into bed. He’d braid his hair, wash his face, eat a snack, and do a shit ton more before that happened. But tonight he had Angus. With the emotional night he’s had he needs the comfort that Angus seems to radiate.

When he opens the door to his room the glow from the hallway highlights a small lump on the left side of the bed. Angus is fast asleep basically drooling on the pillow. Normally, that’s Taako’s side and  _ normally _ he’d be pissed about drool on his pillow. But Angus looks so peaceful and Taako is  _ so _ tired that he just doesn’t care. He tiptoes in and carefully slides himself into the bed next to Angus. He notices that Angus’ glasses are halfway on his face. One side tilted all the way up to his eyebrow while the other side is digging into his cheek. Taako reaches out and pulls them off of him. He reaches over him to lay them on the nightstand.

The feeling of Taako hovering over him must have made Angus stir because suddenly he was attached to Taako’s side. He stops for a second. There was a gut reaction, deep within him, that said this was  _ wrong. _ That Taako shouldn’t get this close to someone, that he shouldn’t let anyone except Lup be this close. But that feeling washed itself away as soon as it came when Taako looked at Angus’ face.

Angus wasn’t smiling before, he was sure of it. And okay, maybe the kid wasn’t as knocked out as Taako had originally thought. But that  _ look _ , it made Taako want to wrap Angus up and never let him go. So, that’s what he does. He grabs the comforter and wraps it around both of them. He pulls Angus closer to his side and wiggles himself farther into the bed. His hand falls to the top of the boy’s head and he tangles his fingers in the curly hair.

He thinks back to what Lup said. About how she’s worried about him. There’s nothing to worry about, though. Angus stirs in his sleep and moves closer into Taako, resting his head on his chest. No, there’s definitely nothing to worry about.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a month since and update and I am very sorry about that. Life just kind of catches up to you out of nowhere you know? Anyways, because of the late update I thought I'd give you an extra long update with a few uhhhh surprises in them. Hopefully I'll be back to weeky (maybe bi-weekly?) updates. Thanks for sticking around y'all.

Moving day is not supposed to be as annoying and painful as it has been. In all fairness it’s completely his own fault. While Magnus has had his place packed for weeks Taako decides that he’s going to start the night before. His plan is to magic his way through it to get it done faster, but within the first 10 boxes he has Mage Hand do for him he starts to get  _ exhausted. _

That’s something that’s different. He knows his own capacity and he should be able to get his entire apartment done before he even breaks a sweat. Unfortunately, he’s laid out on his bathroom floor, looking up at the ceiling, considering all the things that would be so much more fun than this.

In what he can only describe as a miracle, he hears a portal open in his living room.

“Oh thank gods, my saviors, they’re here!” he yells out. He only hears one set of footsteps, though and he raises his head to look at the door frame. Kravitz comes into view with his eyebrows raised.

“Can’t say I’m not surprised you haven’t gotten anything done,” he says. Taako huffs and lays his head back down on the floor.

“My knight in shining armor,” he mumbles. Kravitz chuckles and joins him on the floor.

“So Magnus already has his stuff moved in,” he says. Taako nods his head. Figures. “He’s helping Lup and Barry at their apartment.”

“And what about you, bones? You got everything you need?” he asks. He turns to look at Kravitz. He’s sat against the sink, arms resting on his knees.

“Well, as it turns out I don’t have many material possession that aren’t here already,” he says referring to Taako’s apartment. And oh yeah, he forgot he told Kravitz he’d take care of his stuff. Oops.

Taako was about to say something to defend himself but Kravitz speaks up first.

“ _ However, _ I do have some things at my place in the astral plane I need to get. Would you like to come with me?” he asks. Taako sits up quickly.

Kravitz has  _ never _ asked him to come to the astral plane. In fact, he’d had a long conversation with him once about how dangerous it actually is there. And having living souls there disrupts the plane and the souls within it.

“Isn’t that like, against the rules?” Taako asks. Kravitz nods.

“It is. But I’ve actually gotten exclusive permission from The Raven Queen herself. She would like to meet you,” Kravitz says. And that’s when the ball drops.

“She wants to  _ what? _ ” he asks.

“Yeah I was surprised, too.”

“All those conversations about her  _ not _ being your mother and she wants to  _ meet me? _ Me, your partner in life. The one you sleep with, the one you want to spend the rest of eternity with.  _ Me. _ ”

“That about checks all the boxes. So… is that a yes?” he asks.

“Hell yeah! Let’s do this shit! I want to meet your spooky mom!”

“Don't call her spooky and she's not my mom.”

Taako stands and looks around at the two boxes he managed to fill up.

“Gonna have to do this when we get back aren’t we?” he asks.

“Later problem,” Kravitz says. He pulls Taako into his side and his scythe appears.

“Ugh, this is why I love you. Save it for later, perfect.”

Kravitz shakes his head and smiles.

“Maybe I shouldn’t encourage this.”

He rips a hole in the air and on the other side Taako sees the same black marble walls he always sees when Kravitz leave for a bounty. However, this time there’s a magical energy that surrounds it. When they step through Taako can feel it and it’s  _ strong.  _ A protection spell only a god can accomplish.

Kravitz brings the two of them up to a set of large wooden doors that Taako could have sworn were not there before. His partner is waiting for something and as Taako is about to ask the doors open on their own.

“Turns out spooky was the right word for her,” he says.

“Shush,” Kravitz says as he holds back a grin. He grabs Taako’s hand and pulls him into the room.

Taako's not sure what he was expecting. Maybe a grand entrance like Istus, since she's the only god he's ever really been in the presence of. But instead he's met with a dark cloaked figure. She wearing a robe much like Kravitz, Lup, and Barry’s except hers is covered head to toe in Raven feathers. It hides her figure completely and all he can see is her glowing red eyes.

“I see you have your mother’s eyes,” Taako says. Kravitz looks down and is about to shush him again but is cut short by the queen herself.

“Yes, although it's quite a shame. He had the most beautiful brown eyes before he became a reaper,” she says.

The way she speaks is different than the way Istus does. Her voice sounds like it's coming from the walls around rather than the figure in front of him. Taako starts to rub at his wrist.

“Can I ask why you requested this meeting? And why you have a protection spell up?” Kravitz asks. Taako was wondering that himself. The spell is  _ powerful. _

The Raven Queen hums and moves closer to the pair. Taako can’t see her face, not really. If he doesn’t focus he thinks he sees an outline of a sharp chin, focused eyes, a smooth almost marble like face. But if he focuses too hard it all but disappears.

“I hear that you are making strides in your relationship, yes? Moving is quite a big deal,” she says. She’s not acting suspicious in any way however Taako can’t help but get defensive.

“That a problem?”

Kravitz goes stiff next to him. The Raven Queen laughs and it echoes all around him. A shiver goes down his spine.

“Of course not. I however would like to give you a blessing. Or rather, a gift. To celebrate your new journey,” she says. She shrinks down to their level maybe to be less intimidating. Maybe just as a change of pace.

“That is very kind of you,” Kravitz says. Taako gives him a quick glance and he looks gleeful. He turns back to The Queen is watching him carefully.

“You’re kind of uh, putting me on the spot here bird mom. Care if I take a rain check on this one?” he asks.

She actually laughs. Like a full body chuckle comes out of her and fills the  _ room  _ with it’s noise. Taako would be delighted by it if the shriek of ravens didn’t follow. Figures though, gotta stay on brand.

“Just like his sister isn’t he?” She looks over at Kravitz who’s still beaming. He pulls Taako in and gives him a side hug.

“In so many ways,” he says. He straightens up and lets Taako go. He would whine as he normally does but the presence of his kind of mother in law stops that pretty quickly. “Is that all you needed?”

“Yes, I suppose. Although, seems kind of pointless making you come here for nothing.” She raises her hand and Taako feels the force of some energy leave but he can’t quite pinpoint what it was.

“My Queen?” Kravitz asks.

“Noticed that someone wasn’t ready for the big move,” she begins. She turns toward her throne she had occupied before and walks toward it. Well, more like  _ glides _ towards it. Hard to understand how a goddess moves. “Even if he’s not ready for one of my gifts I can still part with a small one for now. Enjoy your new home. And please, give Magnus my regards.”

Kravitz bows, Taako watches. “Thank you, my queen.”

Kravitz had asked him if he wanted to go back to the old apartment to say goodbye. He declined before Kravitz could finish his question.  _ There’s nothing to miss there. _

So now they’re stood in front of their new house. Music is blasting from the inside and he can  see Lup and Barry in the kitchen dancing as they unpack boxes. The sun is setting behind the treeline casting beautiful pink shadows over their gigantic yard. The small stream is coming to life with singing crickets, blinking fireflies, and grumpy toads. There’s a warm breeze that passes through him and he takes in a long breath.

Kravitz grabs Taako’s hand. Taako squeezes it. In the same moment Magnus comes out the front door, smiling with a few books in his hand.

“I started unpacking all your school stuff,” he calls down.

Taako lets go of Kravitz’s hand, running full speed up the stairs and into Magnus’ open arms. He hides his face into the crook of the bigger man’s neck and plants soft kisses on him. He pulls back and Magnus is staring at him.

“What’s that for?” Magnus asks.

Taako shrugs. “Just… happy to be home.”

Magnus rubs at Taako's cheek, looking completely starstruck.  _Nerd._

"Can I show you something?" he asks.

"Yeah of course."

Kravitz walks up the stairs behind them and moves to get through the front door. Rubbing Taako's back as he passes.

"I'll be inside helping the other two."

Taako looks confused but stays quiet. He lets Magnus lead him downthe stairs, behind the house, past the stream, and into the tree line.

"You know if you wanted to have kinky forest sex you could have just asked."

Magnus chuckles. "Yeah, I got some pointers from Merle on how to incorporate the trees too."

"Ew, gross. Okay I take it back."

He had been too busy making jokes to notice Magnus had stopped both of them. He was looking ahead of them, face lit up a beautiful orange color. Taako turned to his left and sees what Magnus is seeing.

A weeping willow tree sits in the middle of the woods. Enchanting and captivating in it's splendor. The leaves that hang to the cool ground shimmer against the setting sun as if they themselves are magical in nature. The trunk of the tree is tremendous, a dark brown color with every detailed scar in it's bark just as beautiful as it's glittering branches. He didn't notice he had been walking towards the tree until his foot bumped against it's roots. He looks down and takes a step back. The black roots come up from the ground and back under as if they were waves stuck in time. They entangled with themselves and created a perfect bowl like shape on the ground. Taako's breath is lost.

"I found this when I got here this morning. I thought that this would be a good place for you to come and meditate. You know, when things get to be a little too much for you."

As beautiful as this is, that last sentence sends a reflex through Taako.

"I'm fi-"

"You don't need to do this right now. Not here. Not in front of me. Maybe you still need to with Kravitz around but," Magnus moves closer, wrapping his arms around Taako. "But I've been here the whole way. Don't tell me you're fine when I know you're not."

Taako purses his lips. "I don't..." he sighs. "I don't want to talk about it."

Magnus shakes his head. He bends down a places a soft kiss on Taako's forehead. "You don't need to. That's what this is for."

They're quiet for a moment. Letting their breathing steady with the wind.

"I love you," Taako whispers.

"I love you, too."

* * *

 

Taako’s stomach cramps up in the middle of the night and pulls him abruptly out of what was a very deep and peaceful sleep. His hand flies to his stomach and it lurches. Nausea hits him all at once.

He bolts upright in bed and scrambles to get off the mattress in a desperate attempt not to hurl on it. He's not sure how he does it but Kravitz and Magnus stay asleep as he runs out of the bedroom. He manages to get halfway to the bathroom before his stomach gives way and he's hurling his guts out on their beautiful  _ just finished _ hardwood flooring. He falls to his knees and coughs letting what's left of the bile come out. When he finally catches his breath he sits back on his feet and wipes beads of sweat from his forehead.

A few seconds pass as he tries to focus on what's wrong. He can taste the vomit in his mouth and he grimaces. He suddenly feels a cold hand at the small of his back. He smiles and leans back against Kravitz. His ice cold hand moves from his back up to his forehead. Taako lets out a sigh.

“Are you okay?” Kravitz asks.

Taako pays attention to his stomach once again and, nope  _ that _ was a bad idea. He's on his hands and knees again hurling onto the floor. The fluid coming out is burning and choking him all at once. And…  _ gods  _ this is not attractive. That thought would settle more in his head if he wasn't so distracted with his insides trying to come out. So instead he puts his attention back to breathing in between the breaks of vomit.

Finally his stomach stops doing flips and he can lean back against Kravitz again. His knees are properly soaked in Taako’s vomit and he whimpers.

“Sorry,” Taako says. It comes out so hoarse and Taako winces at how sore his throat is now.

“Don't… don't worry about it. Let’s get us cleaned up. Can you stand if I help?” Kravitz asks. Taako takes a moment before answering. He makes sure his stomach won't betray him again before giving a small nod to Kravitz.

His partner stands and in the process helps pull Taako up. He lets him rest his full weight against him and they walk around the puddle of vomit together. Taako waves a hand and it promptly disappears. He feels himself drain from that and slumps against Kravitz more.

“Should have let me do it the hard way, love. You're using up more energy than you have in you,” Kravitz says. His hand tightens around Taako’s torso as he adjusts his grip to the added weight.

“S’fine. Gonna sleep real hard when we’re done here,” Taako says. He leans further into Kravitz’ shoulder and closes his eyes. He wishes the hallway would stop spinning.

They reach the bathroom and Kravitz flicks on the light. Taako can feel the cold linoleum under his feet, the sudden drop in temperature helping a little. Taako silently thanks Magnus for choosing soft lighting in the bathroom despite his own protests. Having fluorescents in here would make Taako’s migraine, which he's just now realizing he has, much  _ much  _ worse.

Kravitz slowly sets him down on the edge of the shower and turns the water on. He finally opens his eyes as he feels Kravitz take his shirt off. He can see the vomit lining his and Kravitz clothes. He frowns.

“I'm sorry I did that,” Taako says. Not only does he feel awful but now he  _ feels awful. _ Kravitz smirks and shakes his head.

“No need to be sorry. I can take care of this,” he says. Once he gets Taako undressed to his best ability he undressed himself. Taako watches absently, taking in how beautiful his partner is. One can never get too comfortable with abs like that around. “Let’s get you in here now, huh? You'll feel much better I promise.”

The water  _ does _ feel nice. In fact, it feels fucking amazing. And having his boyfriend clean him up and get every part of him full of soap? If Taako hadn't hurled his guts out and still felt the ache from that he'd think he'd appreciate it more.

Instead, he rests his head against the shower wall and let’s Kravitz clean the both of them off. There's a moment where the entire interaction is nothing short of blissful. Kravitz massaging shampoo into Taako’s hair, the warm water beating down on his weak body. Kravitz’ cold skin counteracting that and sending sparks flying through Taako’s body any place he touched. He's actually surprised at how well this was helping. But that thought is all for nothing when that familiar pull in his stomach returns and he's doubled over vomiting in between Kravitz’ legs toward the drain.

He’s aware that he’s had better moments than this. Vomiting through his undead boyfriend’s legs in the shower is  _ not _ a good look. And if Taako had the energy he'd blink right the fuck away to avoid dying from the embarrassment of it all. But he couldn't so he'd just have to stay here, doubled over, vomiting on his boyfriend. Fantastic.

Lucky for him, Kravitz is one of the most understanding people he's ever met. And although the situation they were in is nothing short of horrific, Kravitz rubs Taako’s back and let’s him get it all out. Once he's  _ again _ got his shit together he stands upright. If Kravitz hadn't looked worried before he certainly does now. It makes Taako feel even more awful.

“What's going on?” Kravitz asks. Taako shrugs.

“Guess I ate something bad. I'll call Merle in the morning. Have him bring me something to settle myself,” Taako says. Kravitz frowns.

“Are you sure you don't want to call him now?” At this point Kravitz looks unconvinced it’s food poisoning. It is food poisoning, though. It has to be. So, he waves him off and reaches around him to shut off the water. The sudden drop in temperature sends a shiver through him.

“Not gonna wake him up in the middle of the night just because I ate something my stomach didn’t agree with. I'll be fine for a few hours.”

He ignores the fact that this feeling is much too familiar. That he’s felt it before and he knew what it meant then. But he pushes the thought to the back of his head and let’s Kravitz pull him out of the shower.

Once he's dried off and wrapped in a towel Kravitz helps him back into the hallway. He leans against him once again. This time because he's exhausted rather than dizzy. Either way it's comforting and he won't say it but he's really glad he didn't have to go through this alone. Like that time Lucretia did it for him. He shakes that thought out of his head as quickly as it comes because  _ fuck _ that.

When they reach the bedroom Taako is surprised to see Magnus awake.

Well, awake is a bit of a stretch. He's sat up rubbing at his face and yawning. His eyes land on Kravitz and Taako wrapped up in towels, still damp.

“What'd I miss?” Magnus asks. His voice hoarse from sleep. Taako shrugs and pulls away from Kravitz for the first time since getting sick. He opens up his dresser and pulls on pajama pants. He tosses Kravitz some and turns back to Magnus.

“Oh you know it's me, everyone's favorite hot mess,” he says. Magnus frowns. “I just got a little sick is all. Bad food. Nothing to worry about.”

He catches Kravitz frown from the corner of his eye. He decides to ignore it. Magnus pulls the comforter up and gestures to both his partners.

“Come on then, I'll cuddle you to sleep,” he says.

“Not gonna argue with that one, homie,” Taako replies. He gets into the bed and presses into Magnus’ side. His body is much warmer than Taako’s and the elf sighs into him. Thankful that he's finally able to calm down since waking up. He feels the mattress dip down and Kravitz’ arm comes around to touch both his partners. Taako smiles.

When Taako is sure both Kravitz and Magnus are asleep he casts a spell. He doesn't really  _ want  _ to cast it. Partially because he doesn't have the energy for it and partially because he feels like he doesn't need to know the answer. He remembers when Merle and Lucretia did the same thing for him all those years ago.

When he casts it his body becomes excruciatingly weaker. But the spell works and he feels a warmness surround him. He notices Magnus first. His warmth perfectly bundles around Taako signaling to him that Magnus is alive. Then, he notices Kravitz. His is always much weaker than any other creature Taako has encountered. Nonetheless, the warmth is there. But then, inside of his belly, he feels it too.

This must have been what Lucretia had felt when she’d done that spell, too. He never did it himself. He didn’t want to feel that moment when Magnus wasn’t around. And with how he’s feeling about it now he’s thinking he’s made the right choice.   
Unfortunately, he can’t dwell on the situation for too long. He really doesn’t even have the capacity to completely understand what’s going on. He’s expended so much energy his eyelids are already falling. But just as he falls out of consciousness he forces himself to think it. Because it’s different this time. He’s pregnant and it  _ has _ to be different this time.


	5. Chapter 5

“A traveling flea market is going through town this morning.”

Lup pulls open the curtains in Taako’s room letting in the _very_ early morning light. Taako instinctively throws the blanket over his head and groans.

“You sure it’s not the traveling circus? You could join them.”

He hears Lup pad over to the bed and the blanket is quickly ripped away from his face. He groans loudly but sits up all the way.

“Oh, fine! You’re a disaster you know that? The moons barely out of the sky!”

She’s got her arms crossed and she sticks her tongue out at him.

“I’ll get you a granola bar.” She turns towards the door. “Now get dressed! I want to get my hands on the good shit before anyone else does.”

“You’re evil!”

“In most cases, yes!”

He falls back down against his pillow and sighs. And then there’s two sets of arms around him. _Oh yeah._

“You guys want to come with?” Taako asks.

Kravitz only dips his head further into his pillow. Reaper boy is not one for early rising. Magnus however lifts his head up enough and cracks open an eye to observe the scene. He too lays his head back onto the bed. But he also pats Taako’s thigh.

“You should go on your own. Didn’t you say you have something to tell them?”

_Yeah, something I haven’t even told you yet._

Kravitz must have at least been half listening because Taako feels a reassuring pressure on his hand.

“Yeah, I do.”

One thing Lup and Taako did, no matter what planar system they were in, if it had a market they went to it. And now that they’re saviors of the universe or what have you, they rarely have to pay for anything. Although, Lup always insists.

“Don’t give me that look, Taako. The money’s disposable when you work for a goddess.” She hands over more than enough gold pieces to a very thankful shopkeeper.

“You give people handouts they’re going to start expecting handouts.”

Before Lup has time to start and argument with him, a chair comes flying out from behind one of the merchant stands, barely missing Taako’s head.

“I told you to stop nosing around in business that ain’t yours! That was your last warning!”

A scrawny kid, with thick curly brown hair sprints out from behind the stand. A smile plastered on his face as he runs for dear life.

“Wait is that…?” Barry trails off right as another chair comes flying through about to hit the running boy. Lup’s hands goes up and with a bright flash the chair is up in flames.

Taako’s already in a dead sprint. “Angus! What the fuck!”

It takes him a beat before he can catch Angus. The little shit can run _super_ fast and he is not as physically fit as he once was for 100 years. Lack of resets will do that to a person.

“What…” he gasps for air. “The hell…” He drops his upper body and leans his hand on his knees puffing more air. “Was that about.”

Angus at first looks shocked to see Taako, but as soon as his brain catches up a shit eating grin is plastered on his face.

“I’m on a case!”

Oh, of course. Kid’s always got a death wish on his back and 90% of the time it’s because of a case. Taako leans his head down and takes a few breaths. He’s definitely winded, _not_ having an anxiety attack because Angus was in danger.

Lup and Barry catch up to them.

“Come any closer and I’ll rip you to shreds! I got beef with you man! I never fucking forget my beef!”

“Lup, come on,” Barry groans.

“You’re right, you’re right. I’m done,” she says. Taako looks up at her. “Just gonna make sure Bird Mom lets me take him to the astral plane. I’ll make sure the ride is pleasant.”

Taako smiles, still panting.

“Not prematurely,” Barry says. Lup doesn’t reply to him.

“So… what the fuck little man?” she asks.

“He was working on a case,” Taako replies before Angus can even _think_ about opening his mouth.

“That one seemed like it got a little out of control,” Barry says turning back toward the vendor stalls. Most of the crowd that formed from the commotion has dissipated. Angus shrugs. He _shrugs_.

“Eh, it’s fine.”

That hits a nerve. Taako stands up straight, doing his best to tower over Angus. It’s hard these days, he is growing _fast_.

“ _Fine?_ You’re lucky we were here! You don’t know what that man would have done to you when he caught you,” Taako begins.

“He wouldn’t have caught me!”

“The only reason he didn’t was because of Barry throwing himself in between the two of you!”

“That’s not even true I could totally out run him!”

“Could not!”

“Could too!”

“Okay!” Taako throws up his hands. This is fucking _ridiculous_. “You’re grounded.”

Lup inhales and Barry moves his head back. Yeah, Taako didn’t know that was coming either. Angus’ eyes instantly water. He’ll admit, that’s not _great._

“Go to the house. Your room is ready for you,” Taako says. He doesn’t react, he keeps his eyes firmly on Angus.

He can tell Angus wants to argue. He’s been around the kid long enough to know when a debate is about to come. But then his eyebrows uncrease, his mouth pulls tight instead of in a frown, a tear falls but Angus is calm.

“Okay.”

He turns and walks toward the path in the forest that leads to their house. And Taako watches.

“Alright, uh. What was…” Lup starts. Taako looks back at her and he _knows_ he’s looking the same way he’s feeling. And right on time to confirm, streams of hot tears fall. “Oh, oh no. Both of you? Alright, cool.”

Lup grabs his arm and pulls him in for a hug. He sobs into her, no care that he’s in public. He can feel Barry’s hand on his back rubbing reassuringly and that’s okay too.

He’s never had to _yell_ at Angus before. Sure they’ve had their moment where they’ve bickered back and forth but it’s never escalated from there. And Taako never _wanted_ it to.

In favor of making the morning light again and continuing on with the day, he decides it's time to drop another bomb on them. This one a bit more controlled than the spat with Angus.

He wipes the tears from his eyes and stand up straighter. Lup pulls back from the hug confused but intrigued.

“Taako..?” She asks. He takes a long breath.

“Yeah, so. I’m pregnant.”

The three of them are now out on the balcony of the house. Each of them in their own respective lounge chairs watching the birds fly through the trees. Taako all but ignored Lup’s prodding questions of his pregnancy in favor of trying to digest the fact that he _yelled_ at Angus. It still wasn’t sitting well with him.

Well, okay. He didn’t ignore her questions per say. He just couldn’t tell her much. And he _still_ can’t because he hasn’t even told Merle yet. But until then he knows what to look for when something goes wrong.

He _hates_ that he knows what to look for when something’s wrong. But as soon as the thoughts of his first pregnancy even have the opportunity to emerge, he pushes them down where they belong.

“I know you want to know why I did what I did with Angus. I don’t have an answer for you,” he says. He wasn’t aiming it at either of them in particular. He knows they’re both thinking the same thing.

To Taako’s surprise, though. It’s Barry who speaks up.

“I don’t think it matters whether or not you give us an answer. I think he deserves one.”

“Yeah, and I mean,” Lup starts. She sits up in her chair to get a better view of Taako, who meets her gaze. “Even if you _don’t_ have an answer you can at least tell him you’re pregnant. I mean, if he hasn’t figured it out already.”

“He hasn’t,” Taako says quickly. Fast enough that Lup narrows her eyes in suspicion. “He’s not very good about keeping secrets from me. Especially when he figures something out before I’m ready to tell him. He jumps on that shit immediately.”

Taako smiles to himself.

Angus definitely doesn’t know he’s pregnant. But if he did, maybe he would understand why Taako lost his shit the way he did. Stress and hormones and _all_ that good stuff. Oh, and bonus! He’s a smart boy, if Merle’s not here Angus will do.

But he’s just a _kid._ He can’t put that much pressure on him. Even if he knows that Angus will practically beg for it, and knowing Taako he _will_ cave.

Either way he’s made up his mind.

He’s stood in front of Angus’ bedroom door. Hands in his pockets, feet kicking nonchalantly, humming a tune he can’t quite place. He doesn’t have to knock. Angus can hear him and he’ll let him in when he’s ready.

Taako can wait.

And he does. 7,132 seconds he’s sat outside of the boy detective’s door. Finally the doorknob turns, light spills out from the crack between the door and the frame. Angus doesn’t come out.

But Taako’s been through this before. It’s usually when Angus has had a rough day with a case, not a rough day with him. Taako can face this, though. He can fix it.

He pushes through the door.

“Hey, kiddo,” Taako says.

He, Kravitz, and Magnus all put a lot of thought into this room. A full size bed complete with a Fantasy Spider-Man sheet set. French doors that fold out into his own private balcony, made specially with a boy detective sized hammock. His wallpaper has all kinds of nerdy shit on it like the theory of relativity, constellations, math problems that solve the universe or something, spells he’s been taught. Barry did all of that. However, he had the idea for the bookcase with a secret room behind it. A place for him to solve cases.

That’s Angus’ favorite part. But for now, he’s laying in his bed a Caleb Cleaveland novel in hand. He doesn’t say a word.

So Taako’s pulls over his desk chair and sits on it. Feet flying up to land softly on his bed.

“What was going on?” Taako asks.

“Exactly what I told you,” he snaps. Oof. Looks like the venom from this afternoon is still present. “I was _working_ _on a case._ ”

“Yeah, yeah. I hear ya. Working on cases is your shit and what not. But Angus, that looked really dangerous,” Taako says.

Angus squints his eyes at him. Oh, here he goes.

“I literally helped you save our universe from the world’s most annoying vore kink.”

“Okay, first of all, _nasty._ ” Taako grimaces. “Secondly, _that was life or death_. We all had our priorities a little whack at that point.”

Angus throws his book down on the bed and sits up straighter.

“Stop acting like I’m incapable!”

“Wha-“

“I am _smart,_ I am _cunning,_ I’m quick-witted, polite, _kind._ I was _fine_ on my own before the Bureau. And don’t get me wrong, I love you. I love being part of this family, but _why_ are you suddenly getting so- so-“

Angus never trips up his words. Not like this.

He falls apart.

Taako’s feet are off the bed in an instant. He wraps himself around Angus just as quickly.

There were so many ways he could fuck this up and he had to go with the one that made the damn kid _cry_. Sure, that’s just his fucking luck.

“Okay, Angus. Okay, _listen to me._ ” He pulls Angus back to stare at him. If it wasn’t enough to yell at him he had to go and make this happen too. He’s batting well so far today.

“There’s a uh… this _thing_ I need to tell you about, okay? But before I do, I need you to understand something first.”

Angus nods.

Taako sighs.

“I’ve been thinking about some pretty deep shit lately. Have been in, uh… a rough spot. And because of that I’ve kind of gotten more… anxious? About everything. I haven’t told anyone because it really hasn’t affected anyone besides me. Except now, where it’s affecting you. And that’s not fair, pumpkin. I promise I’ll be myself again soon.”

“Thanks I-“ Angus begins, but he cuts himself off. Angus isn’t crying anymore. He’s looking at Taako quizzically, leaning back completely from their embrace.

“Wait, you’re _actually pregnant_?”

“How did-?”

Angus jumps into Taako’s lap.

“I knew it! I knew it! Did you tell Magnus? Is it Kravitz’s? Can reapers even have babies? I’ll have to ask The Raven Queen! Wait, I don’t think they can. But I overheard Lup talking about org-“

“Oh! Alright, alright! Enough of _that_ now!” Taako pushes Angus off him.

“How did you know I was pregnant? Did I let it slip on accident?”

Angus shakes his head. “No, I opened up a case about it! And my hypothesis was right!”

“You…” Taako wants to argue and prod more on all the details Angus found. He feels like he did pretty damn good at hiding the pregnancy. But… “You know what? Yeah, I am pregnant Angus. Nice catch.”

Angus is beaming and Taako _is_ proud of him. But he’s also still upset about earlier, that certainly hasn’t changed.

“Okay, I told you what’s going on with me so I need you to meet me in the middle here.” Angus straightens up to listen. “You can keep doing everything you do in a day. But if you think for even a _second_ something is going to get dangerous, you call one of us. I’m not kidding. Any time of day you get one of us on the stones and we will _help you._ Okay?”

“But-“

“Angus McDonald, I am about to be pregnant for a year and a half. Do not. Push me.”

He knows that look on his face. The one that’s so similar to Taako himself. The one where all he’s thinking is _don’t tell me what to do, motherfucker._

“Alright, I’ll ask for help,” Angus says.

That’s where they differ. Angus can actually show he cares.

“Be home by dinner too, please.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see, huh? I’m back though y’all! The stars have aligned, life is calm, and I can write freely. Next update we’re getting some of that good good fluffy relationship stuff. Also some angst. Sorry I can’t help it... let me know what you guys think!! See you soon!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the formatting on this chapter doesn’t really match the others bc I’m uploading this on mobile. When I get to a computer I’ll fix it. There’s a flashback but unlike the others in italics, I had to just bracket it off.  
> Anyways this chapter means a lot to me. See you on the other side.

There's a lot of things he's certain he needs to do. First, he has to call Merle. Second, he has to tell Merle he's pregnant. Third, lose his fucking mind because this is the second time in his life Merle knows he’s pregnant when his partners don't.

“Fucking cannot believe this shit,” he says to himself. He's sat on the couch twirling his stone of farspeech.

He clicks it to life and hears the familiar scratch followed by silence.

“Merle? You there?” There's certainly movement in the background but no voices. He sighs. “Merle,” he says louder.

Suddenly there's more movement on the receiver until finally Merle's voice becomes clear.

“Yeah, yeah. What?” Merle asks.

“Need you to get over here.”

“Look kid, I'm kind of busy at the moment. Can't this wait?”

“No, it sure can't. You really think I'd be wasting my time on the stones with you if it wasn't important?”

Merle takes a few seconds to mumble something incoherent before answering. “Alright, be there in a couple hours.”

Taako clicks off his stone and leans back into the couch. He sits in silence for awhile until the buzzing in his ears becomes unbearable. He sits up quickly and huffs.

“Need to stay busy,” he says to himself. He stands from his place on the couch and grabs at his hair. He pulls it up into a messy bun, letting a few loose strands fall.

There's boxes at the opposite side of the living room and he grabs at a couple. He tosses them onto the counter and opens drawers. Turns out when you move you realize how much shit you have that you don’t need. So, he decides he’s going to donate a fuck ton of stuff. Plenty of other people that need this shit more than him.

It's not that he's ignoring the problem. It's just that, with Merle not here yet there nothing he can do. He never paid attention the first time when they were learning about elf pregnancies. Now that he thinks about it he's not sure how much Merle was paying attention to it all. If he remembers correctly that was the cycle he perfected one of his psychedelic plants. Merle is all he's got, though. So, he's gonna have to do.

He actually manages to get quite a few boxes filled up. He's not as far as he'd like to be considering the mountain of crap Magnus brought from his apartment that he doesn’t need. But, hey, at least he started.

Merle doesn't even knock on the door when he gets there. He barges in with a thermos in hand and a fanny pack that's playing music. He's listening to some sort of banjo music and it's gods awful.

“Old man, if you think you're coming in here playing that nonsense I'm going to have to kill you.” Taako points at the fanny pack with an eyebrow arched. Merle scoffs.

“Yeah you wish. But your house, your rules. I can respect it.” He clicks off the ugly bag-radio hybrid and shuts the door behind him.

“Speaking of your house, this place is really nice. Too bad I didn’t get an invite until now to check it out.”

Taako rolls his eyes and closes the drawer he was working in, turning his full attention to Merle. “Magnus and I have both tried to call you for the last two weeks. It’s not my fault you’re hanging in the woods like some sort of fucking cryptid.”

“Hey.” Merle points a finger. “Don’t knock it ‘til you try it.”

“Yeah, I’ll pass.”

“So what's this about?”

His blood runs cold. Taako didn't think this far. He didn't think he'd actually have to tell him. He didn't think he would need to say the words out loud. Last time they just knew. The just figured it out.

No matter the reality of the situation he wasn't ready to admit it. He knows it's going to take more than a day to accept. So instead he casts detect life and lunges forward to place Merle's hand on his stomach. He can tell that Merle was thrown off by his sudden movements but if he didn't do it fast he wouldn't do it at all.

He recognizes Merle's facial expression. The one that surprised and excited and confused all at once. He's seen it before in Lucretia, decades ago.

“Holy shit,” Merle says. Taako nods. He pushes Merle’s hand away once the spell wears off and flattens out his now ruffled shirt.

“I know.”

“You're-”

“I know.”

“Obviously with-”

“Magnus. Yep. Don't really think a reaper can knock me up.”

Taako sighs and walks over to the couch. He plops himself down and swing his legs up to land on the coffee table in front of him. Merle follows him and sits back on couch letting his own legs dangle from the seat.

“Suppose you haven't told them yet,” Merle says. Taako nods his head.

“I think Kravitz knows something is up. Told him I had food poisoning.”

“You're poisoned alright.”

“Shut up. Lup, Barry, and the kid know,” Taako says.

“You told them before you told the ones who knocked you up?” Merle yells.

“I am aware I did this ass backwards, geezer. I just need you to make sure I don't kill it, that's all. Do you need to do anything?” Taako asks waving his hand around his stomach. Merle shakes his head.

“Gotta wait a couple weeks for it to establish itself. Lucky for you human fetuses mature pretty quickly. It's the elf genes that takes awhile. So, I can let you know how healthy the little thing is soon,” Merle says. It's impressive to Taako how much he still remembers from the years it's been since this happened.

“Only problem is,” Merle begins. Taako snaps his head towards the dwarf. “I'm going to need Lucretia’s help doing a complete diagnosis.”

* * *

 

He remembers the morning being warm. Lucretia had forced him up early, even before the sunrise and ugh, that was a chore. But she insisted it was important and dragged him out of bed. Now that the rest of the crew was back he had to be secretive about the whole pregnancy thing. He didn’t want only Lucretia and Merle to know. If he could take his pick it would be Lup. But letting anyone else know before Magnus can? That’s unacceptable.

Lucretia led him through the hallway and out the side door of the ship. Merle already had a blanket laid out on the ground. Taako half expected it to be freezing but the breeze blew past him and curled around his body. It was warm and inviting and honestly, he felt good. So he sat on the blanket and let the two of them fuck around with spells. If he was a more curious person he’d ask what sort of shit they were doing with his Magnus spawn. But instead he chose to remember the moment.

How pink the sky was, how the outline of the trees glowed, how the birds were just waking up chittering their morning songs. The grass underneath was soft, it felt different than on his home planet. The grass didn’t tickle him as much as it nestled around his body. As if the ground were a blanket tailored to him. As he inhaled he felt a gentle press against his stomach. A feeling extremely foreign to him. When he jolted his head up he was met with a soft smile from Lucretia.

“I felt it too… your baby kicked.”

* * *

 

Taako's stomach drops and the sensation of throwing up is growing. It's been awhile since he's had such an emotional reaction to the very mention of her name. Magnus talks about her all the time. But the possibility of him seeing her? Of her having to take care of his baby? Absolutely not.

“No.” He’s firm with his answer. Merle puts his hands up in defense.

“Okay, that's fine. I just won't be able to do a couple of the tests that's all. She doesn't have to come.”

Taako is suddenly holding back tears. The table he's resting his legs on wobbles as his foot starts to shake. He doesn't mean to get so worked up and he silently argues with himself to try and stop. She doesn't have to be here he reminds himself.

“Is it because of what happened? I mean, th-the first time?” Merle begins. “Because this kid is going to come out just fine. Even if it kills me, I'll be sure of it.”

“Ugh, don't be so dramatic,” Taako replies. He sees the smile on Merle’s face and almost pulls one too.

It's weird when the two of them have moments like this. And it almost makes Taako want to vomit as much as the mention of Lucretia. However, he notices the longer the two of them talk, the less his leg shakes. Weird.

* * *

 

Grief has a funny way of ripping it’s way through people. Taako always thought that the five stages were bullshit, Magnus disagrees. And Kravitz. Well, one would think he’d have some sort of understanding of grief given he’s a reaper and death is sort of his thing. But Taako’s come to understand his way of seeing it. It’s just another plane, another life. Only… eternal.

Magnus always does something for Julia's birthday. In past years it's been visiting Raven’s Roost and volunteering wherever he could. The year he met Merle and Taako he disappeared for a week and returned as if nothing had happened.

This time her birthday fell on a day the three of them were all at the house. He's not sure if Magnus knew the whole time or remembered when it was too late. Either way, they were sat near the pond with their feet in the water when Magnus brings it up.

“I have something that I need to do,” Magnus says. He has been quiet for awhile as Kravitz and Taako talked on about features of the house they were going to add. At some point Kravitz mentioned having a water slide connected to their balcony and it spiraled from there.

When Taako looks over at Magnus he's staring at the still water intently.

Crickets were chirping around them and the wind started to pick up at the tops of the trees. He can feel a storm.

Magnus looks over at Kravitz and pulls a sad smile. Taako wants to reach out and hold him. Wants to make the pain disappear.

“You know that poem I gave you? Did you ever make something out of it?” Magnus asks. Taako's eyebrows furrow. He'd never heard about the poem. Kravitz face lights up and he quickly pulls out his scythe. He tears through the astral plane and reaches in to pull out an acoustic guitar. Taako is sat still, confused by the exchange.

Magnus looks over at him with tears brimming the bottom of his eyes. The wind picks up again but it's warm around them. So warm.

“I wrote her a song. Kravitz is going to play the tune. Will you listen?” He asks. It's a pointless question.

“Of course,” Taako says. He's terrified of what's going to happen next. Magnus always has a difficult time on Julia's birthdays. Most of the time he tucks himself away for awhile. His solitude was always the one thing Taako could expect. But this, being this open... he’s paralyzed.

Kravitz strumming begins and the atmosphere around them changes. It's a much sadder song than he'd expected although he should have expected something like this.

Magnus starts to sing and it leaves Taako breathless. The song makes him quiver and sets his nerves on fire. Mix that with Magnus’ voice that shakes and cracks with his grief. It's a broken melody.

Broken in a way that only really fits for a grieving partner. The way a heart heaves at the thought of their lost loves, like ones chest could shatter from the simplest touch. He knows Magnus’ lungs burn as he sings his sad song.

Taako watches stunned as Magnus unfolds. Tears falling freely, lips shaking, lyrics filled with his whole heart. He can see Kravitz staring intently as he strums, worried but determined.

Taako wants to be a part of it somehow. He looks down at the pond their feet are dipped in. He moves his hand back and forth over it and suddenly the water changes. It's begins to sparkle a deep golden color and dances with Magnus’ music. He looks up to see the water reflect in Magnus’ tears. He chokes up himself.

“You know it's hard, heaven knows I've tried but it just keep getting harder.”

He feels something wet and cold against his cheek and he looks up. Small drops of rain fall on them and make the water below dance even more. He makes the spell stronger and illuminates the drops around them casting a curtain of golden light. It surrounds them as Magnus’ singing gets softer suddenly. His pitch drops as rumbles of thunder increase in volume.

While Magnus’ singing gets softer the chirping and the wind and the thunder cease. As if the world is holding on for a moment to let him have his time.

The thunder cracks and sheets of rain start to pour down around them but Magnus, through all his tears is much louder. As if he’s leading the storm himself. Taako's golden curtain of light shimmers against the downpour. He lets the beat of the storm and the music lead his body into movement. He sways back and forth with Kravitz suddenly mirroring the movement. Magnus gets louder and louder until their ears are filled with nothing but his unfiltered grief. Although the storm above them is raging it's no match to the feeling the three of them are sharing.

They're all crying as Magnus’ song comes to a close. The storm continues to intensify but they can't do anything except stare at each other. Their salty tears mix with the rain, their hot breaths becoming steam in the cool air. Taako has to let the gold light dim otherwise he'll pass out from all the energy flying out of him. Both magical and emotional.

Kravitz drops the guitar and pulls Magnus, who's crying the most, into a tight hug. Taako practically falls into it himself, unable to stay away from them any longer.

“I love you guys,” Magnus cries out. His voice is hoarse.

He shouldn't say it, but he has to. Maybe he planned on saying it this whole time. Or maybe it’s the fact that there's so many feelings in him he's sure he'll explode if he holds them in too long.

And no, it's definitely not the right time to say it. But he’s not sure any time will be.

“I'm pregnant,” he blurts out.

The way the moment shifts, Taako could swear he’s jumped realities. And he knows a thing or two about what that feels like.

His partners pull away with lightning speed. Their faces are a mixture of shocked and confused. Both two emotions he was absolutely expecting. Not to mention getting information like that at a moment that's completely inappropriate.

“You are?” Magnus asks.

They're still holding onto each other. Kravitz places his hand on Taako's face. His mouth is open but no words come out. Magnus is crying still, now Taako is sure for different reasons.

“Yeah, this was kind of super emotional. And my hormones are raging right now, natch. So I thought I'd, you know, make it about me.”

He can't really think of anything else to say. Terrified doesn't even begin to touch on how he's feeling. But to finally let it out. To finally say those words to Magnus after losing his first chance, and to see Kravitz’s face light up in ways he’s never seen before… it’s nothing short of perfect.

It’s shocking really. The warmth he feels being enveloped in his partners arms. Not just the physics heat of them, Kravitz surprisingly warmer than Magnus. He’s warm all over his body, he can feel his blood pumping, his heart beating. And the slow rise and fall of his chest. The tears that fall from his eyes are blissful, relieved, maybe a little sad too.

The rain is still falling heavy on them, the thunder rages on, and their grief is clouding them. But there's something new in the air, something to celebrate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, it got me too y’all. It got me too.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We got some nice sweet moments in that last one, but alas I am back with the Angst™️. Great news, though! We’re getting to the heart of this story, y’all. Hope you’re liking it and thanks for sticking around through my awful terrible updating schedule! Until next time ;)

His nightmares are never frequent and that’s what makes them so terrifying. The initial shock of waking up sweat covered and crying was a lot. But the anticipation, knowing there will be another time when that same dream will come, it kills him.

He’s in a pitch black room. He knows it’s a small room despite being unable to see anything. His breath comes out heavy and uneven. Why was it so warm here? So dark?

In a moment, the ground underneath of him falls and he tries to scream but it doesn’t come out. He’s falling and falling and falling into the darkness. Unable to move, breath, feel,  _ think. _

And then he’s on solid ground again except this time with a spotlight in front of him. And a man standing in the middle of it. A familiar man. Brightly colored boots, grey flared pants, a paisley design button up with glitter sparkling against the light. He’s leaning on a red umbrella, peaking past the brim of his hat. It’s him. It’s Taako.

“Tell me,” he says. But the voice is wrong, Taako doesn’t sound like that. Nonetheless his doppelgänger continues. The spotlight following as he moves closer to him. “How does it feel?”

“What?” He asks. The word barely comes out. Honestly, he’s not even sure if he’s said anything. But his copy, his  _ twin _ seems to understand.

“How does it feel to have lost them?”

“Who?” Taako tries to get up from the ground but he’s cemented. He tries to move his hand but when he looks down the floor is eating him up.

His copy moves closer and gets down on both knees. He smiles wickedly at him but it’s…

Taako takes a shuddering breath and focuses his vision on his twins eyes.

This isn’t his twin. He has one. Her name is…

Who?

“You’ve never been away from them. You’ve never known anything else. How does it feel? That I ripped them away?”

Taako’s trying to push against whatever force is keeping him down but his body is all but sludge now. Every time he makes an effort to move the floor swallows him up more. He cries out against the pressure but it’s futile. His head is almost covered.

“Who did you take from me?” He screams. Hot tears fall down his face and it’s the realest physical sensation he’s felt so far. He makes one last ditch effort to take a swing at his doppelgänger but the copy bounces back. He stands at full height and watches as Taako struggles.

And then, right before all his senses are lost, the doppelgänger hisses. “Pathetic.”

* * *

 

Today, it’s really hard for him to get out of bed. It’s not because of the nightmare, although that certainly didn’t help. As much as he wants to blame it on some emotional ass shit, chalk it up to hormones, and move the fuck on…

He can’t.

Taako cannot physically get out of bed because he wakes up with some wicked cramps. They’re so powerful he launches up in the bed and screams in agony at the pain in his abdomen. He falls back with a huff. Once his vision cleared he looks around the room and sighs at the general emptiness of it.

Of course the day he wakes up in pain is the same day Kravitz and Magnus leave the house early. That’s just his fucking luck.

“Lup?” He calls out. He hisses in pain. Even the strain from yelling is too excruciating. He tries not to think of the implications of that.

Except, Lup doesn’t answer and suddenly he’s frantic. He’s felt this rush of anxiety before. Any time he thinks too hard about losing her. Even worse, if he thinks too hard about forgetting her. He’s tried to train himself out of that. Lup is  _ not _ going anywhere. She literally cannot die, she’s basically fucking invincible.

But knowing that doesn’t stop the dread from settling on his chest. He’s alone. And he is… so scared.

He looks over at his nightstand, he can just call someone from his Stone.

And it would have been so simple, had it not fallen on the floor. He casts Mage Hand but the ghost like hand dissolves into the floorboards. He’s too weak to even cast  _ that. _

So now he has no choice but to panic.

Taako knows he needs to grab the stone because he has to call  _ someone. _ He takes in a deep breath, braces his stomach with his hand, and lunges forward.

An awful idea in retrospect because the pain he feels now, it’s blinding and a piercing scream escapes him.

He has died over and over again but none of that measures up to this.

Something smooth brushes his fingertips. He looks through his hair which is now stuck to his sweat lined forehead. He’s just barely touching the stone and he  _ really _ shouldn’t move any further. He’s already so close to passing out, though. And he  _ definitely _ can’t do that until he calls someone.

So he taps the nearest button and hopes for the best.

He’s had a long life so far and if Krav is telling the truth, he’s going to have an even longer one. (Although this experience isn’t convincing him of that possibility.)

Amongst his life he’s had probably some of the worst luck. Except today.

The stone comes to life, crackling and fizzing. Signaling to him someone answers.

“Oh!” he says and he’s so surprised by it he moves. “Motherfuck!”

He screams out again, it’s anguished and he  _ sobs. _

“Taako?” Oh, there’s that bad luck.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” he says but it comes out in broken sobs, his abdomen on fire at this point. He doubts she can even understand him.

“Taako? What’s wrong?” Lucretia sounds worried and while that’s all well and good, it’s the  _ last _ person he wanted.

But another cramp surges through him and he screams, his ears ringing.

“Okay! Oh my gods, okay! I need you… to get here…  _ now, _ ” he snaps through gritted teeth. Tears fall down his cheeks.

“What is th-“

He doesn’t even give her the chance to finish.

“Please, I think the baby is dying.”

He’s pretty sure she gets there like,  _ extremely _ fast. Now he can’t say that for certain what with him falling in and out of consciousness. He does however, wake when she gets there.

She’s got her hands raised over his stomach and they’re glowing a beautiful white light. The pain isn’t gone but it’s dulled. She’s crinkling her face in concentration, not even aware he’s awake.

“You teleport here or somethin’?” He croaks out. She jumps slightly and looks at him before returning her eyes to his stomach.

“Something like that,” she says.

He nods in response, his eyes still heavy.

This is good enough for now, he doesn’t have the energy to be upset she’s here. He says thank you on accident. He falls asleep before he can take it back.   
  
  



	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome, welcome. I had to put my feelings over the newest Amnesty _somewhere_ and I figure, why not the story I've been wanting to write very very badly? So here's some more of that Good content.  
> Catch you on the flippity.

The act of waking up is very difficult for him. And while it seems like a simple task, open your eyes, look around, experience the fresh morning air… It’s just not  _ simple  _ anymore.

Some days are better than others much like all things in life. He’ll wake up a little distorted but nonetheless  _ awake. _ Magnus and Kravitz now at either side of him, the sound of Lup making breakfast in the kitchen. Those mornings are wonderful and he can feel life breathing within him.  _ His _ life being lived around him. One that he and the rest of his family worked so hard to get. But those mornings are few and far between.

He wakes up with a start and for a moment, it’s  _ always _ just a moment, he doesn’t know his name. He’s not sure where he is, who’s next to him, or what those noises are. And he  _ panics. _ Just as quickly as it came that moment passes and a firm clarity presses itself into his mind.

Lucretia is sitting next to him. She’s pulled up a chair and is writing something down in a notebook. It’s weird because she’s usually so  _ delicate _ when she writes. But now she presses the pen down into the paper furiously, surely leaving dents on the following pages.

Call him paranoid but he really doesn’t like seeing her write. And he certainly doesn’t like it  _ now _ , when he knows there’s a good chance it’s about him.

“Stop that,” he says and his voice is hoarse. His throat sore and burning but he doesn’t remember falling asleep like that.

To his annoyance, she reads his confusion. “You were still screaming after you lost consciousness.”

She sets her notebook down on the nightstand next to her, laying the pen on top. He tracks it and tries to read some of the scribbles on there but he can barely make them out. The only thing he can is-

“Numbers?” He asks.

She nods and looks over at it. “I’m just recording your vitals so Merle has them. I’ve already called him, he’s on his way.”

He rolls his head and looks up at the ceiling.

“Gonna take him fucking forever to get here. Did you get ahold of anyone else?” He doesn’t make eye contact with her, but he can feel her burning a hole into the side of his head.

“Lup was the only one I could get in touch with. She said she’d be here soon as well.”

Taako only nods.

They stay quiet for a moment and Taako wishes it would stay like that. Really, he wishes she would leave but until someone else gets here he doesn’t want to be alone. Besides, he has questions.

“Is the baby okay?”

She doesn’t answer right away and that’s cause for concern. He turns to her and the look on her face... he’s seen in before.

Countless times during their cycles and when they were about to leave for Wonderland.

She’s worried.

“What?” he asks.

“I… I’m not sure,” she says.

“You’re not  _ sure? _ What the fuck do you mean you’re not sure?”

She leans back and sighs. He doesn’t give her long to sit in silence.

“Lucretia I swear if you don’t tell me,” he starts.

“I can tell you what I  _ think _ is happening. If you let me speak.”

He’s beside himself that she’s even in his house. Now she’s snapping at him and he has half a mind to tell her to leave. The pain in his abdomen forces his silence.

“I’ll need Merle here to help me verify a few things. Well, really I need Barry…” she starts to trail off before sitting straighter. “Either way we have to be careful about how we use magic around the baby, it could have lasting effects.”

“Okay, yeah skip the technical bullshit. I’ve already been through this once before with you. What’s happening?”

“Like I said I really need Barry and Merle here but, I think part of the light of creation is inside of you. Surrounding the baby.”

“The  _ what? _ ”

Lucretia is about to answer when a tear in reality itself interrupts them. Much like it always does.

“Hey! Look who I found.”

And there strolls in Lup with Merle in tow. She had on her full reaper uniform but is already stitching her face back and beaming at him.

“You look like shit,” Merle says.

“Weird I was going to tell you the same thing,” Taako snaps.

“Yeesh, hit a nerve there,” Merle says.

“What’s going on?” Lup asks at the same time.

Which, that’s fair. Taako did just almost feel like he was dying, call Lucretia who he hasn’t talked to in well over a year, and he probably  _ does _ look like shit. Lup has the right to be suspicious.

“Lup, you know more about the light than I do,” Lucretia starts.

There’s a hollow look in Lup’s eyes when she says that. He’s seen it before in all of them. During the last ten years on the ship when they were broken and  _ terrified. _

“The… light?”

He could hear her voice quiver. It was slight but certainly present.

“Don’t tell me we need to deal with that bullshit again,” Merle says.

“It’s not what either of you are thinking. Taako is…” she looks over at him, checking to see if it was okay to continue.

“The light is in me.”

“ _ In you?”  _ Merle and Lup exclaim in tandem.

“Yeah I vored it.”

“Ew,” Lucretia says, her mouth turning to a frown.

He ignores her in favor of watching Lup as she climbs into the bed.

“Does it hurt?”

He tries to sit up but another shooting pain ignites in his belly. He yells out in protest not making it any farther than leaning on his elbows.

“Merle?” Lup asks concerned.

He’s already over to Taako’s side of the bed. As quickly as the pain had come, it’s gone.

He sighs content. “Thanks.”

He pushes himself up all the way now, a bit hesitant at first. Lup hovers her arms over him as he slides up to lean against his head board.

“I take that as it hurts a whole fucking lot,” Lup says.

He blows sweaty hairs out of his eyes. “You’re very observational.”

She shifts on the bed and puts her hands out, casting a spell he doesn’t quite recognize.

“Okay, so what the hell? He’s got  _ the light of creation _ inside of him? How does that even happen Lucretia?” Merle moves to grab a few bottles out of his bag. Taako shudders as he recognizes a bottle of brown sludge with flecks of purple in is.

“Get that shit away from me.” He points to the table Merle set it on.

Lucretia follows his finger to the bottle and swipes it off the counter.

“This “tea” is nasty and was never good for him in the first place.”

“Oh, what do you know?  _ I’m _ the plant expert here.”

“Expert is a bit of a stretch there my friend.”

“Hey, what are you doing?”

The conversation dies and so does Lup’s spell. Taako looks over to his bedroom door. Magnus must have just gotten done with work. Behind him he hears footsteps running down the hallway and Angus comes into view. He ducks under Magnus’ arm and squeezes past him.

“Taako!” He runs in excitedly but stops in his tracks as soon as he sees everyone in the room. “What’s happening?”

“Hey, kiddo. Not really sure what’s going on. Something fucking absolutely wild for sure.”

“Lucretia?” Magnus speaks up again. He looks between her and Taako a few times. “What are you… I mean, who…?”

“I called her,” Taako says firm.

He can see cogs turning in Magnus’ head. It takes a moment but finally his legs start moving and Taako is  _ enveloped _ in Magnus.

He forgets sometimes just how healing a hug from Magnus can be.

_ The grief wasn’t supposed to hit him this hard. He thought he was careful. Never talking to the things, not looking at himself in the mirror, not even a thought would pass his mind unless Merle and Lucretia were alone with him. As if he really gave them much of a chance. _

_ But the loss he felt was devastating. He almost couldn’t hold himself together when he reset and luckily for him no one but Merle and Lucretia were watching him. Magnus too busy being swept up by everyone else to notice his immediate absence. _

_ Enough time passed and Magnus finally found his way back to Taako’s room. Getting a moment of alone time he knew the brunette desperately wanted. He wanted to grant that to him but he couldn’t pocket his sadness away. So, Magnus had to see him break. _

_ And through his ugly tears, his unwavering sobs into the darkness, Magnus stayed. He didn’t ask questions. Not yet at least. Instead he sat in front of Taako and crushed their chests together. Holding onto Taako harder than he’s ever been held before. _

_ He was finally feeling something more than loss. He felt Magnus’ heartbeat against his own. A steady beat harmonizing, giving him something to focus on. He chokes on a cough and his crying fit halts. He hiccups once. _

Magnus wipes tears from Taako’s face. He hiccups.

“Taako… are you okay?” Angus whispers.

The wizard quickly smacks his hands to the tops of his cheeks. Rubbing away any excess moisture and hopefully concealing any puffiness. He huffs and leans back now that Magnus has let go of him.

“Light of creation?” He points to his stomach. “In my belly.”

Magnus and Angus’ eyes both widen.

“Well technically it’s in your-”

“Who scheduled a family meeting?” Barry’s voice interrupts Merle.

He walks through the doorframe, Kravitz in tow.

“No one babe Taako’s sick.”

“You’re sick?” Kravitz asks. Taako groans and slams his hands on the bed.

“The light of creation is in my  _ fucking _ body, threatening my  _ fucking _ child.” He pushes himself off the bed and expertly dodges anyones attempt to help him up.

“Where are you going?” Lup asks. She must have been about to cast that spell again. Oh well.

“I am going to my kitchen. I am grabbing the pickle jar. And I am going to eat the whole thing outside. Alone.”

He doesn’t wait for anyone to speak. He doesn’t want any part of that conversation.

He gets halfway through the pickle jar before the baby begins to protest. It kicks him softy at first and then a  _ much _ more violently. Yeah, no doubt this is Magnus’ kid. 

“Ouch, little guy. Careful there.” He rests his head against the base of his meditation tree. His hand falls against his stomach and he moves it in circles. “We’re a little fragile right now.”

Magnus and Kravitz are going to come looking for him soon. They’ll definitely have questions for him and after being out here he feels more inclined to answer. But until then, he keeps his eyes closed and lets the soft breeze brush up against him.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s gonna be a sad one~~

They left Lup and Barry arguing with Merle in the kitchen. Angus and Lucretia pour over a notebook of theories in the living room. All the while Kravitz and Magnus have a thousand yard stare. Thinking a lot of things, feeling even more. They only need to share a glance to know what’s most important.

Is Taako okay?

So they go deep into the forest, both men already knowing where he is. They’re silent for the most part save for Magnus’ heavy breathing. Something close to a sob but not quite there yet. Kravitz can’t bring himself to comfort him as they walk so he settles for standing close to him. Brush their hands together once in awhile. Just enough for Magnus to know he’s not going through this alone.

There’s a small dirt path leading the way to the tree. Although they’ve walked it more than a handful of times it feels unfamiliar now. Maybe it’s because it’s dusk, or maybe it’s something more than that. The sick pits in their stomachs, the nervous and excited beating of their hearts. Well, one heart but Kravitz is pretty sure if he had one it’d be thumping out of his chest right about now. They’re buzzing because  _ a baby _ they’re terrified because  _ Taako. _

He’s fast asleep under the willow tree. The pickle jar falls from his limp hand, rolling away from the tree. It gains speed splitting the dry leaves under it. Gaining momentum until it clinks against a boot.

Kravitz and Magnus share a look.

“I’m almost scared to wake him up.”

Magnus huffs nervously. He splits a smile to pretend everything’s fine. Kravitz presses a cold hand to the small of his back.

“Come on, he needs us more.”

Kravitz is good at persuading. Magnus guesses that it comes with the territory of his job. Lup and Barry are persuasive in their own ways but Kravitz is special. He’s smooth and welcoming. Magnus always thought that about him, even when he was trying to collect their bounties.

They walk together and lean down in sync on either side of the sleeping elf. Magnus reaches out a finger and brushes a piece of hair away from Taako’s eye. He stirs and his eyes flutter open.

“Tell me I’m dead and you’re coming to take me away. Please I crave my eternal slumber.”

“Oh let me check...” Kravitz looks up at the sky and squints, taking in absolutely no useful information. He looks back down with a smirk. His dreads fall into his eyes. “Nope not time yet.”

Taako groans covering his face with his hands. Strong calloused fingers wrap around his wrist and slowly the pink of the sky filters into view again.

“Taako, you have to talk to us about this now.” Magnus says.

He catches Magnus’ gaze. A lot behind those tired eyes but he’s most concerned of the tears pooling. He sits up quickly and huffs. Magnus falls back on the forest floor surprised Taako was so quick to get up. Kravits kneels down too.

It’s cold out now and maybe he should be having this conversation inside. Tucked away in their bedroom but he’s ready to say something  _ now. _ And he knows himself, if he gives himself any time to think he won’t say shit.

He reaches out to his bracelet and tugs.

“I have to tell you something and you have to just  _ let me get through it,  _ okay? Mags that means you especially. I need you to…” his voice is already breaking. For decades he’s had this heavy weight on his heart. A feeling of grief and sadness that was tucked away safely. In a space he wouldn’t need to access. Kravitz’s hands are on his cheeks catching tears he didn’t know were there. Magnus rubs his knee.

“You can tell us. We’re here for you,” Kravitz whispers. The forest is quiet now, almost like it’s waiting for the confession too.

“There was a cycle where you died.” He looks at Magnus, locking eyes. “You’d gone on a scouting missions with the rest of the crew, only me, Lucretia and Merle were at the ship. Do you remember that?”

“Yeah, I remember.”

“I was pregnant. And Magnus you were dead. I-I know that’s not your fault but it was really hard with you gone. Lucretia and Merle read so many books, put me through so many  _ tests. _ I couldn’t be excited, though. You were gone and that’s part of the reason but I knew, even though Lucretia said the chances were high of it surviving,  _ I knew it wouldn’t work. _ ” He can barely see Magnus now his eyes are blurred with his tears. And his voice is cracking with grief, the pain and sadness finally surfacing in a way he’s never let it. Even worse than the way he broke down with Lucretia.

Arms are wrapped around him but he’s so lost in his guttural sobs to know where he ends and the other two begin.

“I… tried… so  _ hard _ to stay strong for that baby. To keep us alive for you so you could come back and see us and know we’d be  _ alright. _ ”

“Taako, look at me.” Magnus’ strong hands are on his cheeks but he squeezes his eyes shut. “No,  _ look. _ ”

He takes a moment but eventually opens them. A hiccup escapes.

Magnus is crying. He flicks his gaze to Kravitz and sure enough he’s crying too. It takes a lot for that to happen.

“We  _ are _ alright. What happened before… I’m so sorry that happened to you. I’m sorry I wasn’t there and  _ I’m sorry  _ I was part of the reason you had to go through that. This is different now, though. We’re not planar jumping and we have a family who knows more about the light of creation than anyone in the entire universe.

We are going to take care of you through this.” He rubs circles into Taako’s cheeks catching every tear that falls.

“I don’t know if I’m strong enough to lose something like this again.”

Kravitz squeezes Taako’s hand. “So we won’t lose. We’ve been on a winning streak lately.” He moves closer to Taako and presses their foreheads together. Magnus moves his hands so he’s holding both men in a hug. “We are going to take care of you. I promise.”

Kravitz is quiet now but as always he’s soothing. And Magnus’ strong hands are grounding.

For so many years he’s felt guilty. As if he did something wrong, as if it was his fault this happened. Bad things were meant to happen to him his whole life. So it made sense his heart stay heavy, as a reminder of what he lost.

He feels a flutter in his stomach.

And he sobs more.


End file.
